Re: PBFH

[happy2bstepmom]

Well let me start off by explaining the situation.  My husband of 14 yrs has a daughter whom now lives with us.  His ex wife calls all the time wanting her money.  We recently moved and my husband changed jobs so we are sending it ourself.  Anyway, PBFH doesn't work and pretty much has nothing to do but call us and make our life a living hell.  She knows all of our business and is driving me crazy calling.  One day she called several times, she was going to get her daughter a ball and glove for softball, but as the day went on she kept calling she sounded drunk, but she told me she was taking xanax, and kept taking them until she could quit crying over her daughter moving in with us.  She also told me on another occassion, that her daughter was in high school, and that I shouldn't buy her clothes at Walmart, they should come from the mall, because she wants her to look nice...
The child is 17, and doesn't know how to cook, do math, spell, read very well, and has pretty much been sheltered all her life.  Me and SD get along very well, but the BM is driving me nuts.  My husband is ready to give up.  We will never get the CS caught up.  The BM knows that if she calls the AG, they will bring him to court and she can get some more money, even though we have the child.  She says that he owes it to her, and he should continue paying even though we have her.  She deserves it.  Anyway, sorry to go on and on, but I don't know what to do, and no matter what, BF will always lose.  He can't even have a relationship with his daughter because of BM.  WHAT TO DO???? Thanks for listening...!

[VeronicaGia]

>Well let me start off by explaining the situation.  My
>husband of 14 yrs has a daughter whom now lives with us.  

**Has custody been changed through the courts?
His >ex wife calls all the time wanting her money.  We recently
>moved and my husband changed jobs so we are sending it
>ourself.  

**He is sending it through CSE, correct?

Anyway, PBFH doesn't work and pretty much has
>nothing to do but call us and make our life a living hell.
>She knows all of our business and is driving me crazy calling.

**Why do you continue to answer the phone?

> One day she called several times, she was going to get her
>daughter a ball and glove for softball, but as the day went on
>she kept calling she sounded drunk, but she told me she was
>taking xanax, and kept taking them until she could quit crying
>over her daughter moving in with us.  She also told me on
>another occassion, that her daughter was in high school, and
>that I shouldn't buy her clothes at Walmart, they should come
>from the mall, because she wants her to look nice...

**Stop talking to her.

>The child is 17, and doesn't know how to cook, do math, spell,
>read very well, and has pretty much been sheltered all her
>life.  Me and SD get along very well, but the BM is driving me
>nuts.  

**Which is exactly what she wants.  She's not happy, and she will make sure you aren't either.

My husband is ready to give up.  We will never get the
>CS caught up.  

**How far is he behind?  Has he filed for a modification asking the judge to abate it since he has custody?  In other words, will the judge consider taking monthly support off his tab to offset the fact that she is not paying him?

The BM knows that if she calls the AG, they
>will bring him to court and she can get some more money, even
>though we have the child.  

**Maybe, maybe not.  Your husband needs to be able to support the child since she isn't doing it.

She says that he owes it to her, and he should continue paying even though we have her.  She deserves it.  Anyway, sorry to go on and on, but I don't know what to do, and no matter what, BF will always lose.  He can't even have a relationship with his daughter because of BM.

**He needs to stop allowing his ex to run his life.  You too.

>WHAT TO DO???? Thanks for listening...!

**Stop taking her calls.  Turn the phone off if you have to.  Keep a journal of every one of her calls.  She's harrassing you and she's winning.