Packing a Bag

[WIdadof2]

My ex gf refuses to pack a bag for my son on the weekends that he's with me. She tells me I have to buy him clothes, shoes, ect for him for my house. I pay child support. More than I have to a week actually so this doesn't make sense to me. DO I have to buy him all this stuff when he doesn't get to use it but 4 days a month?

Thanks,
Keith

[Peanutsdad]

Read your court order. Each case is different. In my case, each parent provides their own.

[oklahoma]

My husband's court order specifically states that BM is to provide appropriate clothing for when my SDs are at our house.  She has never done it since I have known my husband.  Partly, because my husband holds his daughters to different dress standards than BM does.  There have been a few times that clothes she sends them in ended up in the trash....  

You also sometimes just have to pick your battles--clothing is just not worth it for us.  We have not had parenting time with my SDs for nearly two years and are on the verge of starting up again.  We will likely ask BM to provide clothing at first (my SDs are now 10 and 11--old enough to pack their own bags for the weekend.)  We can gradually build up the wardrobes again, with trips to secondhand stores, WalMart, maybe some outlet stores.  My husband is a full-time student, with CS order based on full-time employment, so things are really tight for us too.

[Feelincrazy]

My ex (we get along very well) has clothing for the kids at his house.  But we do not have clothing for SO's kids here.  So, it is up to you.  Whatever you do, since she is being difficult, be sure to KEEP the clothing you buy at your house, and if the child is young, go to yard sales and inexpensive places until the child slows down on the "growth spurt" stuff.  You can get great deals on wonderful stuff at yard sales!!

Pick your battles!

[rini]

Keith


do not pay a penny more than court ordered ..
use that money to purchase a few things for the child.

send child back in the things she sends him in and keep your stuff at your home

rini

[mango]

Our order states each to have their own wardrobe.

But  a great place to find stuff is consignment shops. You can get a ton of stuff for dirt cheap. Perfectly good too. Since they grow out of it so fast I think it's a perfect sollution.

Besides I prefer my SD to wear our stuff. Because one time she got a grass stain on her knees and her mother wrote us a letter requesting money for the ruined clothes. So best to have your own, to avoid problems like that.

Also, what she wears from her moms to our house, we simply wash and have her wear back when she goes back. So our clothes don't go over there and disappear.

[Mom2004]

I know it is standard in the guidelines in my state that NCP do in fact need to provide those things while in your possession. Cp is not responsible for sending anything; other then the child with what they are wearing.

There are thrift stores you can go to and pick out 2-4 outfits for less then $20 total! Use those clothes while on visitation then send the child back in the clothes he came with. Problem solved.