father's parental rights

[angela0048]

My name is Angela.  A friend of mine is going through a nasty divorce in Florida.  He currently lives in Texas; however, his wife and 3 children live in Florida.  The Court issued temporary order that have him paying child support and alimony (they were married 5 years) in excess of $1,494.49 per month.  This leaves him a little less than $1,400.00 per month for his own living expenses.  He does have an attorney representing him in Florida; however, this man does not seem very interested in getting the matter resolved.  It has been pending since October, 2002 and the Temporary Orders have been in place since December, 2002.  He has not be able to see his children since the split in July of 2002.   He is not hopeful that this will not continue even after final hearing.  The wife has a tendency to "hide" the children on the few occassions they had arranged for him to see them.  He is to the point of relinquishing his parental rights, but I'm not sure that's the answer.  This is a good man, a good father, but he is being punished by his wife for no longer wanting to be married to her.  Does anyone have any advice?  He is at his wits end.

[Peanutsdad]

Without knowing the specifics of the case, the only advise I can give this man is fire that lame ass attorney and find one with some balls, preferably female with a mad on against the system. It worked for me ;)

[StPaulieGirl]

He's paying over half his salary in temp support?  

The wife has a tendency to "hide" the children on the few occassions they had arranged for him to see them.

Nice.  He needs a good lawyer that will fight for his rights.  This thing seems to be dragging on way too long.  For instance, out here, the wife could possibly collect alimony, but only for half as long as the marriage lasted, because it is considered a short term marriage(that's in CA).  That would be 2.5 yrs.  There is a lot of good information here for your friend, but he has to want to fight for his rights.  All you can do is show him the info here, and let him decide what he wants to do.  I hope he reconsiders relinquishing his rights.

[angela0048]

The specifics are husband left the wife and kids in Florida to move to Houston.  He no longer wanted to be married to wife.  He did however, prior to any papers being filed continued to send wife money.  During the first 7 weeks of the separation, she continued to receive his payroll checks as they were direct deposited into her account (approx $7800.00 total).  They separated in June 2002, she stopped paying the house note and her car note in July 2002.  She continued to live in the marital house until June 2003 after a forcible eviction was filed by the mortgage company.  In February 2003, she traveled across 4 states  to Texas in the middle of the night to steal his vehicle, which was paid off, since hers was going to be repossessed. (Remember, she stopped paying on it back in July 2002.)  After the cops in Texas stopped her, then refused to detain her, citing family issue, not their jurisdiction, Husband traveled to Florida in hopes of securing her car, catching it up on the note and using that.  She assaulted him, cops were called.  She refused to let him leave with the car.  None of this has gotten before the court.  She refuses to allow him access to the children.  He has never missed a payment to her.  The court has order telephone visits, which she fails to keep and his attorney won't press the issue.  Husband is so far in debt right now, he can't fire this attorney and hire a new one.  He's to the point of just representing himself.  If you have any advice, please let me know.  The wife is angry and spiteful....she uses the kids as pawns, and even has the audacity to call with gift suggestions for the children, know he is now clearing less than she is with the payments he's making in alimony and child support.  

[gipsy]

Start interviewing atty's , He needs to get a parenting plan in order , States vary a little but , Generally you get a temp parenting plan also , this is typical of vendictive psycho's . He maay have to cut down on the payments , If the atty did not set a trial date . Right after the temp order I would consider talking to other atty's , Interview them and ask . look on this site for atty selection ,And read it , this is nit rocket science , I FIRED TWO ATTY'S   don't be afraid to fire an atty , Just ask what the deal is , After this long the problem is obvious , UNLESSthere is a trial date and they are just waiting . I had an atty do that to me , You at least need anm atty , thatvtalks to you like a human being , and explains the legal procedure , Forget all the other crap its a legal issue , My case strung out for  3 years , But there was a good reason , I won't explain it all , But there can be reasons , But when you are waiting there really shouldnt be any charges , there really is so little to family law , Read the family law chapter for that state , It will say basically how the marital estate is split etc , He needs a parenting plan in order , Its not too hard you just have to file with the court , have her served etc ,You can go to a parrelegal and get the papers or search this site for state specific papers , if he can go watch family law at the court , That would help , No atty has ever said anything I could not have said , the best this I ever made my atty say is ,
     Mr XXXX Just wants to see his kids . her atty" bla bla  
     the commissioner said OK its not hard , At first they make up false domestic violence alleagtions and here they have to appoint a Guardian ad Litem , And the commissioner had to see the report , then i got visits . it took a few months but just go file a parenting plan and then see what she does and look for a new atty

[Indigo Mom]

He has a lawyer "type" who'll end up dragging this out til the kids are 18.  He'll probably even create more problems.  You know lawyers, they LOVE getting that whopping huge check every month from their clients.

I agree with Peanutsdad...fire this lame-o and get a new one.  

I wouldn't think relinquishing his parental rights is an option.  When the going gets tough, the end doesn't say "the tough relinquish their rights"...the tough get going.  Fire the rat bastid, find a new one, and get cracking.  Dad has a right to see the kids.

[nosonew]

And, (agree with the others on everything), if he relinquishes his rights, HE STILL has to pay child support!  Doing that lets her win and him and kiddo's lose.  DONT DO IT!