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custody on an infant

Started by mammamiaxo, Dec 13, 2005, 06:42:57 PM

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mammamiaxo

Hi, im almost 18 and i just had a baby , im in college and am doing more then well at providing all of the baby's needs... to make a long story short the father of the baby(20 years old) started out the 9 months of prgnancy requesting abortion and denying all responsibility.. i made the mistake to not take him up on the offer of getting his parental rights taken away. and now hes trying to get custody rights because im not letting ihm take the baby becuase im saying hes too young(5 weeks old) he lives in a house off campus with a bunch of his college friends

ive been more than nice throughout the first month trying to accomodate the father and his parents,for the sake of the child, but a 5 week old baby shouldnt be leaving and "hanging out" as he puts it  iam being treated with total disrespect and am sick of it..

-how old does the baby have to be till he has the right to take him without my supervision?
-what rights is he entitled to?
- can you use drug proof and underage drinking in court without saying where you got it?

i just need some guidance in this..

Kent

Is he named as the father on the birth certificate?

As long as there is no custody order, you can keep the child from him. However, courts will not look favorably upon you if you choose to do so.

He will need to take you to court to get visitation established. And he may.

I am not sure about the drug and alcohol use, but I think it would be inadmissible. However, you can request the court to order a drug screening.

And, as soon as he goes to court, he will also be forced to pay child support.

You (and he) would be far better off to reach an agreement with him, without court interference.

I understand how you feel about the baby being away from you. However, keep in mind that I, as a father, would feel the same, and so may he.

Talk to him, try to agree on sharing time (the three of you) during which no arguing is allowed. This way he can get used to handling the baby, you can get comfortable with how he is handling the baby (assuming he handles the baby well), and then work towards shared parenting time.

As soon as he will be with the baby, insist that it is just him and the baby, and only direct family members, or no more than one person.
The baby shouldn't be there while he's hanging out with his friends. Make it clear to him that "baby time" means time between him and the baby, and not his friends.

Eventually you will need to get custody established (and child support, etc.). If you show to be cooperative with him, your chances of obtaining custody are high.

Kent!