Custodial parent denying medical help

[dadwholoveshis2kids]

Hi, Will try to get to the heart of my current problem.  I am a very dedicated father and my girls mean everything to me. My Exwife has custody of our 2 girls.  The court ordered her to provide the medical insurance for them, which she has done for the past 10 yrs of our divorce. I remarried 1.5 yrs ago and my Ex has tried driving a wedge between my new wife and I by badmouthing me to our girls every step of the way. (For the record, the Ex had multiple affairs which led to our divorce, so I do NOT understand the badmouthing at all, but I think it is totally wrong to manipulate children in any way.  She actually told them that since I met my new wife, my children no longer mean as much to me!)  The children are having some difficulty adjusting to my new wife and the whole blended family situation.  My wife and I want to help my children by taking them to family counseling.  The EX is refusing to give me the insurance information needed to schedule an appt. She says this is not HER problem, and since SHE pays for the insurance, she will deny it being used.  To me, it seems cut and dried that she is refusing medical attention that her children need and that is illegal.  By law, isn't she REQUIRED to keep me informed of current insurance information for the girls?  If they were to fall down and break an arm while at my house, I am sure she would not deny them medical attention.  Mental health issues should be no different.  I have told her I will pay the copay and any other balances unpaid by insurance, but that is not acceptable to her.  This is all a control issue to her and is so unjustified.  I have never denied my girls anything and have always paid child support and more. Any input is appreciated.  

[ocean]

Yes, she should give it to you. Have you tried to formally get it from her. I would mail her a certified letter stating the facts and ask her to respond to you by a certain date or you will take it to court. Will she "allow" them to go as long as you are paying? Is it just a money issue or she does not want them to go at all? Do either you or your wife have family coverage now that you can just add them to your plan? (it would be sooo much easier for you to deal with it and then she will not get the bills....I was able to cover my SD for no extra charge so she had two) Good luck!

[ocean]

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[babymine]

I had the same kind of problem when DS was 8mnths old.  His father was ordered 6mnths previous by court to put him on health ins.  He did this, but refused to give me a copy of the card or any info.  When I called the insurance directly, they said I couldn't get any info because I wasn't the policy holder.  I had asked numerous times for the card when taking DS to doctor appts, and I practically begged for it when DS had bronchiolitis and was about to be admitted to hospital.  FYI, people providing the service do not have to call the insurance to get the info, and in some cases, the insurance will not give it to them anyway if they don't have a policy number, etc.  The hospital took the info that I had and somehow got the remainder of the info they needed from the insurance.  Not until we went back to court did I finally get the card.    

Good Luck!

[4honor]

Ask to see their file. The Insurance information will be in it.  There are two ways to go about this:

1. Since family therapy will not all be covered under the Health Insurance (since part is for you and new wife and part is for the kids) only a portion of the amount MIGHT be covered. You can Pay for all and take BM to small claims for the re-imburseable part.

2. You can get the insurance info off the record and pass the info to the provider at time of service. They will pay their covered part, and you will pay as the responsible party on the other part.

[wendl]

IF they dr won't let you see the file, go to their school and ask to look in their contact information file, it should be in their also.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[dadwholoveshis2kids]

Thank you all for the recommendations!  I love what is written about a good man having to do nothing to triumph over evil.  I try to live by that rule, though some days it is very difficult to not feel walked on.  In the end, I really believe that is the best motto to live by though.  Thanks again!