Pressured into signing a mistake....

[dipper]

Hi everyone.  My brother is going through an unwanted divorce.  There has been plenty of nastiness during this process.  I love my SIL dearly and she is good to the family, but really vindictive to my brother.

About three months ago, she handed my brother separation papers in front of her coworker and told him he needed to sign them...they detailed financial aspects and matters of their child.  They argued and she was very insulting as was my brother.  later, she called him and apologized and said to take his time.

The very next morning, around 8:30 a.m., she called and demanded he sign the papers by 3:00 that day.  He was threatened that if he did not sign the papers she would have her attorney file papers that day to take him to court - going after more of his money (retirement), spousal support,  and suing for attorney fees.  My brother could not even afford his own attorney and was very scared of her threats.  He signed the papers.

Now, he is realizing that he didnt understand what he was signing.....they were drawn up by a lawyer and my brother, while wise in life, has always struggled with reading.  He knows nothing about court matters and could not even tell me if this paper has joint legal or joint physical.....

His STBX is very book smart and does her research.....

My brother is now willing to do what it takes to hire a good attorney.  But, he has to pay a nice sized retainer down before this attorney will talk to him as he has did a consult and phone consults with my brother previously......My brother doesnt want to shell out all this money if he is simply stuck with the papers he signed anyway.

As he was emotionally distressed by her threats to take him to court and threats of financial distress, does he have any chance of fighting this legal standing?


Also, this week his STBX got mad at him and would not let him see his daughter.  Usually there child rides the bus to his business atleast a couple of times and she would not allow it.  Even went to the school and picked up child to make sure he didnt get her.  

Should my brother send her a certified letter detailing this action and inform her that the normal schedule will resume this week?

I told him that he should even take the time if he can to go to the school after his daughter and talk to the principal if STBX has already picked her up......have it known by others that he is being refused his child...

[Kent]

You do not specify if whatever he signed included parenting time, and if it has been signed off by a judge yet.

Assuming that all is the case, he needs to call law enforcement EVERY TIME she denies him his parenting time. They will not do anything, but they will write a report, of which you will then the next day request a copy.

If it has not been signed by a judge, then it isn't worth anything, and he does not have a leg to stand on. On the other hand, she won't have a leg to stand on if he goes to school and picks up the child.

If she hasn't filed anything yet, then he needs to obtain an attorney and make sure his attorney files first - for custody and divorce.

Make him aware that this is not some sort of setback, THIS IS WAR!!!!
He needs to stop being the nice guy, and fight as hard as he can for his child.

Good luck!

Kent!

[mistoffolees]

Your brother should go ahead and see an attorney.

The important issue is whether the court approved the signed agreement or not.

If they did not, he's probably OK. His attorney needs to file for divorce immediately, demanding custody, etc. An agreement involving child custody is not binding until the court approves it (as I've learned to my dismay).

If the court DID approve the agreement, he can go after his ex for contempt for violating the visitation. Also, he MAY be able to argue that he signed without understanding it, although I'm not sure how well that works.

You should ask Socrateaser. Technically, your brother should ask because Soc won't answer questions for third parties.
http://deltabravo.net/dc/dcboard.php?az=show_topics&forum=106

[dipper]

Kent, I didnt even think to ask him if it had been signed by a judge.  We all tried to explain to him to file things first and not to sign anything.  He just really believed that she would never use their child.  

Some of our family has gotten tired of telling him because he doesnt seem to listen.....I just dont want to see him lose his child because we all know how hard it is to gain any ground back once you've lost it...

[dipper]

Unfortunately, I didnt think to ask him some key questions.  however, I know my brother has not been to court at all.

Wouldnt he have to go before the judge in order for the judge to sign this into effect?

Soc said the same - that the key is whether a judge has signed this or not.  

thank you...hopefully I will get to talk to my brother again  tomorrow about all of this.  

[dipper]

My brother said he has not been to court, and as far as he knows, there has been no judge's signature added to these papers.

The papers stipulate that he only gets EOW.  His STBX had verbally told him that he could see his child any time he wanted.....Now, she is enforcing the EOW.  He lives three miles from his child, works one mile from her, has the family home, family nearby, and he has the right to see his child four days a month!  I do not know what he was thinking....

He reminds me of my dh.  My dh got really burned when he and his ex split.  She researched and found what to do....he didnt even know where to begin.  old school thinking.  My brother is the same...he doesnt know anything about this and is just trying to survive.  He was bullied and caved from it....

He did say he would contact the attorney tomorrow.