Contempt pro se (raymi)

[WhatToDo]

raymi---Yes I would very much like to hear what you have to say since apparently I have absolutely nothing to go on. What kind of proof can I get if nothing I have will work? This site says to use those Letters of Intent but according to Soc, there's really no reason to use them. And if nothing I have will help me, what point would it be to have a lawyer anyway?

Basically, according to Soc, there's nothing I can do except get her on tape denying my visitation. But she NEVER will answer the phone, so that doesn't work either.

[sunnyin_fl]

I was reading your post on Soc's site and here is what we did and what we got and how long it took and until right before the end.....we were pro-se.

Mother denied visitation to me (father) for a few months....I didn't know what to do, she moved...I went to a lawyer, who said I couldn't do anything, because we have moved together before (we were never married) but we had a custody action of joint 50/50 every day and EOW in place.  

Go forward 5 months, I filed pro-se contempt of visitation.  I had certified letters that I had sent, and in those letters I put date, place and time to meet.  I went...drove 3 hours each time...knowing she wouldn't show up....got a receipt and had a police officer meet me at around the same time....I asked for a domestic standby due to hostility on the mother's part and wanted to keep peace.  I asked them to file a report each time and if they said they didn't have to, I explained the situation and if they still refused, I at least got the dispatchers name, the police officers name and badge #.  

I kept a phone log of every call.  I kept a journal by the phone and wrote in it every day.  By the time court came around, I had all my ducks in a row....she didn't show up for court.  1st strike, because a small hurricane had passed through on the weekend, she called the court and said the roads were not passable....she in Georgia, us in FL....all jurisdiction in FL still.  Well because I knew she was lying, I called Georgia DOT and asked if the roads she claimed were unpassable were indeed such, I asked that they fax me the information.  Of course, I knew she lied and I used that evidence in court as well.  

Not only that, we called her sister and one of her friends to show we made every effort to reach her to find out where she was...and got a receipt of the location of pick up referenced in the letter.  In your letter tell the other party to notify you in writing withing 5 days on their intent not to bring the child and to send it certified, heck even include an already prepaid envelope with a yes or no letter inside...make it easy for them to screw up...because they will.

You and they have the burden....she only had excuses....she failed to show up again and this time the magistrate stuck it to her.  But we still had to wait for her to respond within a certain time before the Judge would sign off...well...she finally showed with an attorney who said I failed to disclose all information that the child would be starting Kindergarten in 06....filings all started in May of 05..uh....didn't think it would take 6 months.  Long story short...we got an attorney because the judge asked them to file a reason as to why he should vacate the order he had just signed and us to file one as well....at that point...we had to get an attorney...but it worked out....we received over 6 months of make up visitation and now we are asking the court to change custody to me because of drugs found in my 5 year olds system the first week of visitation after almost a year of not seeing him...mom's a loser.

So take what you have, do a little more....take a friend with you...take a video camera...if it is a public place....you can video...we did and didn't need it...the judge didn't want to see it.  But it helps if they do show up to keep them under control.

GOOD LUCK!

[WhatToDo]

Thank you so much. Yes I put in the letter that she had to respond by a certain day. I also wrote that if she didn't respond, then that meant she was fine with the dates and times. She of course didn't respond the first time and she didn't show up. We had a police officer with us (me and my fiance') and he wrote a report saying she didn't show. I sent my ex another letter a couple weeks ago and visitation is to be this weekend. She didn't respond to this letter either but I'm sure she won't show up. I am going to have an officer with us again.

When she doesn't show this time, I think I will take your advice and put a stamped envelope with the instructions "circle yes or no" and see what happens.

Her excuse for not calling me back whenever I called was that my number was long distance and she couldn't afford calling cards. So I got a new cell number that is local for her. Does she return any calls? OF course not.

Who do I need to talk to at the courthouse to file papers pro se? Clerk of Courts?

[notnew]

What to do:

Contempt is relatively easy. Yes, talk to the clerk of the court and they can either provide the proper forms or direct you to the pro-se assistance office (if there is one in your court).

Internet is very helpful too. Some courts have sites that give all the information on how many copies to file, forms in PDF (some even fillable), etc. Just look around.

There is a pre-paid phone card that used to be able to be purchased through this site (SPARC Card). I don't know if it's still around or not. I used this card several years ago.

The good thing about this card is that the receiver can only call the numbers you designate with it. Also, you can view and print out the history so you will be able to prove how often it was used and where the calls originated from (cool feature!) If she says she tried to call you using the card and didn't get you.

For a time too I had an 800 number attached to my regular #. The card had a special pin on it and child could call from anywhere with the 800 number.

I have to tell you that these two cards did not improve my phone contact very much. The contempt sticking had more of an effect and my contact was a lot more regular after that. The cards gave me added oomph during the hearings.

Please see my response to Soc on his forum regarding my experience with contempt and evidence.

It's worth a try I think.

[sunnyin_fl]

Your welcome.  We went to the courthouse and spoke with the clerk and they have  a self-help program.  They were only allowed to give us the forms and tell us the procedure "no law advice was allowed".  However, like the above poster said...the internet is your tool.

What state are you in?

[WhatToDo]

I'm in South Dakota (4th circuit court) and the website for here has nothing for information that I could find. The pages seem to be incomplete like it's under construction.

[sunnyin_fl]

I looked on the web and found //www.sdjudicial.com and found a civil case filing form...doesn't address what you are filing, just a form that will go with the contempt I'm sure.

Have you called to see if they have a self-help program, or have contempt forms available?  Our court had a small package and fee that had everything we needed.  Then we just filled it out...it gave the jest of what was needed and we filled in the rest.

[WhatToDo]

Thank you for looking that up!  If I get a chance today, I'm going to stop by the courthouse. Friday's are slow so I might get time. Thanks again!