WHAT DO I DO?

[mellow]

My ex is the CP and has my kids(twin 11yrs old boys) enrolled in mulitple sports(which is great to a point ,but without my input).We have shared parenting/joint custody,she was allowed to move to Ohio from Kentucky.We are to meet half way every other weekend on Friday early evenings(1 hour drive each way for both of us) but  she hardly ever does (she is suppose to per court order)and when she does she is ALWAYS late. My kids are constantly enrolled in select soccer to the point it has influenced all/every weekend of my visistation and any contact that I might have with them.I can't even get to talk to them during the week on the phone because they're always busy,they never return my calls.On my weekend she expects me to drive to columbus(2+ hour drive one way) and pick-up the kids after their games and then meet her half-way on Sunday,which I have done on occasion (I do have a family in KY that this impacts). Now she's telling me(via e-mail) to talk to my kids to see if they want to come to my house after their game on Saturday for Sat. pm and miss their game on Sun.which this puts me in the bad guy scenario. Theres alot more than this to the story but Im frustrated and want my time with my kids at my house.The pick-up point is in Ohio(when it happens).How do or can I call the local authoritys to record the denial of visitation? Can I drive to their house and call the local police with KY court order in hand?What will my kids think?

[mistoffolees]

You must follow the court order exactly unless the two of you agree on a change (and then have it approved by the court). Alternatively, you can petition the court of a change.

The fact that she his signed them up for various activities is irrelevant. If she takes the kids to a soccer game instead of to their court ordered visitation with you, she's in contempt.

If you can document the fact that she is not honoring her obligations under the court order, you could file a motion to have her found in comtempt. If the contempt is serious enough, you might conceivably be in a position to request a change in custody, but the requirements for that are pretty high.

Basically, it's no longer about what you and she think is appropriate. It is first and foremost about what your court ordered parenting plan says. Only if the parenting plan does not address an issue does the opinion of you and your ex matter. As long as she violates the court-ordered plan, she's in contempt - but you need to be able to prove it (with witnesses, documents, etc rather than just your own statements).

I would suggest that you consult with an attorney or at least with Socrateaser (keep your paragraphs short and go right to the heart of the matter if you want a response, though).

Good luck.

[Hawkeye]

>If you can document the fact that she is not honoring her
>obligations under the court order, you could file a motion to
>have her found in comtempt. If the contempt is serious enough,
>you might conceivably be in a position to request a change in
>custody, but the requirements for that are pretty high.


I agree.

[MixedBag]

Getting and order enforced by using the local police usually doesn't work.  Family court orders are done in the civil courts, and police officers assist in enforcing criminal laws, not civil orders.  However, in some states and jurisdictions, the pendulum has begun to swing the other way.

I think for starters you gotta keep a good written log of what has been happening each and every time the order is violated.  Mainly because it's difficult to remember what happened whenever a parent doesn't follow the order.

Secondly, think around the problem.  Is there any way that your EX will give you make-up time for the missed time with the children?  (My guess is that the answer to this question is gonna be no....but I gotta ask).  Continue to negotiate an answer, but file something with the court say in a month.

She was allowed to move from KY to OH....does that mean the court allowed the move?  And that transportation was ORDERED to be a meeting point of half way?

Personally, I'd give her a month to give you make-up time for the periods missed because the children need both parents.

Then I would file a "Motion to Show Cause" or even a "Motion to Amend Parenting Plan" because it's not working.

You have no choice otherwise she is going to push you out of your children's lives and that's not a good answer to the situation.

[mellow]

I REALLY appreciate the feedback.

Yes, the transportation was ordered,but she dictates/manipulates the times ,all the time.

It also states in the order that make-up time will be to my schedule ie availability due to the nature of my job.

I've started a log and I'm going to type-up a denial of visitation form with all the times and try and file it with the court. I plan on doing this on Monday, not sure on how to do it, but Im going to the clerk of court to ask questions. Hopefully they'll point me in the right direction.

This weekend was suppose to be my visitation,but see refused to meet me at the pick-up location. I called her and she said she was not denieing me visitation, that I was more than welcome to come to columbus and watch them play their games.

[CGS]

My parenting plan has a section that says both parents must take the kids to their activities during their parenting time, and that absent illness of the child the child must be present at all activities at the scheduled time.

Does you order address the kids' activities anywhere?