Adoption Consent Denied By Me - Indiana

[scottyNsissy1130]

Hi. First off , I live in Ohio and my daughter lives in Indiana. The great grandparents have legal gaurdianship of my daughter and have for the past 6 years. I visit my daughter when I am granted the ability to , I send her cards , and give presents at holidays. No child support was ordered either. I have however offered on multiple occasions to pay it. I have recently had a visit with my daughter middle of last month. Now , I'm unsure if I should have posted this here or under custody or what not...

Now , where my questions are. I recently recieved a letter for consent to adoption proceedings and I have sent a denial letter to all parties including the court. Even though there is an open gaurdianship (1)Are these great grandparents able to have my parental rights terminated even when I have visited my child and such ? (2) During this adoption stuff and my contesting it , will the courts appoint me an attorney ? (3) Am I able to at this time have real visitational rights put on paper so I can have my daughter with me in the summer in Ohio? (4)Will the courts take into consideration these great grandparents medical conditions (cancer)and ages ? (5) If my exwife consented to adoption proceedings , does this terminate her parental rights indefinately to where if I am able to over turn the gaurdianship that I will not have to take her back to divorce court as my daughter was not an issue then due to the gaurdianship ? (6) when I was employed for 5 years at a steel mill company , I kept insurance on my daughter reguardless of their telling me to go ahead and drop her off it. Isn't that going to look better on my behalf ?

Thank you for any help given , so I know which direction things can go with all of this.

[Ref]

so first I recommend you find yourself a good lawyer. I don't think courts appoint lawyers in civil court. Spend the money. DONT SKIMP! You have too much to lose.

I recommend you gather evidence of your visits and your gifts/cards, to the extent you can. It seems your biggest arguement is that you are still active in the child's life. You need things like pictures, airline ticket stubs, credit card statements showing you spent money there... any irrefutable proof that youwere with your child. Put together a calendar labeling when you were with or contacted your child. This isn't only important for everything up until now, but you should keep track until the child is 18.

Unless you have some criminal history or there is more to the story, I think it would be very difficult for them to terminate your parental rights. They may be able to get sole physical custody. I think, when you speak with an attorney, you should ask for visitation rights.

When you hire an attorney, you need to get one in Indiana. Get one that specializes in Family Law and preferably, Father's rights.

If you don't have a visitation schedule right now, you should definately take this opportunity to get one set up. If it is as slow moving as DH's court cases, this summer would probably be a write-off. You could ask for a temporary order but if you haven't spent much time with her lately, the court may want you to see her in smaller amounts, increasing over time.

If you think that the Great grandparents are not physically able to care for your child, that is more of a custody issue. It sounds like you are happy with them having your child on a day to day basis and not really concerned. A judge will not be happy if you are fine with their physical condition over the whole year but argue it is not good enough for the summer. It will look like you are picking on them.

If your ex loses her parental rights, you will be dealing with the great grandparents from here on out. Child support will likely be ordered for you to pay them and you will have a visitation agreement with them. Your court dealings will just be with the legal guardian.

I think the fact that you paid health insurance on your child might be helpful. I would avoid owning up to being told you didn't have to provide it. Let the ggrandparents admit that. It might help in showing that you have been willing to be responsible for your child this whole time.

Good Luck
Ref

[mistoffolees]

That is all good advice. GET A LAWYER NOW!

I also agree that it seems unlikely that your parental rights would be terminated unless there's something in your background that you haven't disclosed (sexual abuse, drugs, etc). However, the fact that the grandparents were given custody seems odd - whatever happened at that time to cause you to lose custody to the grandparents could be brought up again.

I can't add anything to the rest of the advice - it all seems quite reasonable to me.

[Ref]

From what you posted, you haven't paid support this whole time. You need to prepare yourself that the GGPs will go after retroactive support. They might use this as a way to bargain that you give up your rights.

This gets very complicated because support really should have been coming from BM as well. This is another reason an attorney would come in handy.

Google "child support calculator" and the state your child lives in. Then figure out how much you would have owed, year by year since the child was born. Add that all together and that might be what you are facing. Don't panic about this though. Usually the judge will spread out the payments over a long period of time. It seems, from my limited knowledge of the state of Indiana, you will be facing retroactive support from the time you lived with her as a family, or since she was born if you never lived together after the baby was born.

Good Luck, you will be fine

Ref

[mistoffolees]

I'm going to have to reconsider my answer. I came across an article in the FAQ which is in some ways similar to yours:
http://deltabravo.net/faq/cust_ans45.php

While in this case, the parents already have guardianship, it appers that it's not as clear cut as I thought that you would be able to get cusotdy. From the FAQ, you may be able to block the adoption, but sole custody might be difficult at this time.

I will, however, stick with my recommendation that you need an attorney.

[scottyNsissy1130]

Hi there ,
 
Thank you all for answering me back. I have never been in trouble with the law in my entire life so that's not an issue. When my ex and I were together we signed the papers for gaurdianship willingly because we were young , listening to the great grandparents and their lawyer , and bein' told we would be able to see my daughter and take her out of the home when we wanted to. But nothing was stipulated in the papers at all about visitation , child support , or anything else. These GREAT grandparents (my ex's grandparents) have kept my daughter from getting to know my family , my brother has seen in maybe twice in her entire life due to these people. My dad isn't allowed in their home because the great grandfather has made it impossible to get along with him. My grandfather passed away before Amanda was able to get to know him and seen him maybe two or three times. My mom goes to visit with me and my now current wife when we're able to go.

It's not that I want my daughter with them right now it's more of a matter of she's used to them , in school , and what not. And I think to just try and jerk her out of their home would be a very emotional thing that could possibly hurt her big time. Otherwise , I would like to be able to get her removed from their care and into another family member's home until I am able to get all the court stuff squared away and able to take her out of the state of indiana. Therefor she can be ween'd so to speak away from the great grandparents.

When I sent money for birthdays and what not , it's always been cash so I know there is no way of my bein' able to prove that. I've got very minimal receipts of all the stuff that I have bought her due to the fact I never thought the great grandparents would pull a lot of the stunts they have and I wanted to build more of a relationship with my daughter and so my wife of 2 yrs would be able to build one with her as well before trying to do anything legally. Between my mother and myself , we've always taken pictures from when we have been there visiting. When she opens gifts we take pictures. Some of the stuff that had been given to her are handmade so there is no way of really placing value on that.

What it all comes down to , these people are being vendictive because they knew I had lost my job of 5 years and trying to find another so they felt that it was time to give me a low blow of doing this right now. They have never brought up child support until I told them no to the adoption. But if a court wants to make me pay back child support so be it. I'll do it with a smile because I know I have a lot more rights once it's all on paper and they won't be able to pull the stunts they have in the past. Not to mention it would give me even more of a pot to pee in as far as having the gaurdianship terminated.

[scottyNsissy1130]

ahh I messed up , look for the #5 a couple up for my response...

[scottyNsissy1130]

Hi there ,

Thank you all for answering me back. I have never been in trouble with the law in my entire life so that's not an issue. When my ex and I were together we signed the papers for gaurdianship willingly because we were young , listening to the great grandparents and their lawyer , and bein' told we would be able to see my daughter and take her out of the home when we wanted to. But nothing was stipulated in the papers at all about visitation , child support , or anything else. These GREAT grandparents (my ex's grandparents) have kept my daughter from getting to know my family , my brother has seen in maybe twice in her entire life due to these people. My dad isn't allowed in their home because the great grandfather has made it impossible to get along with him. My grandfather passed away before Amanda was able to get to know him and seen him maybe two or three times. My mom goes to visit with me and my now current wife when we're able to go.

It's not that I want my daughter with them right now it's more of a matter of she's used to them , in school , and what not. And I think to just try and jerk her out of their home would be a very emotional thing that could possibly hurt her big time. Otherwise , I would like to be able to get her removed from their care and into another family member's home until I am able to get all the court stuff squared away and able to take her out of the state of indiana. Therefor she can be ween'd so to speak away from the great grandparents.

When I sent money for birthdays and what not , it's always been cash so I know there is no way of my bein' able to prove that. I've got very minimal receipts of all the stuff that I have bought her due to the fact I never thought the great grandparents would pull a lot of the stunts they have and I wanted to build more of a relationship with my daughter and so my wife of 2 yrs would be able to build one with her as well before trying to do anything legally. Between my mother and myself , we've always taken pictures from when we have been there visiting. When she opens gifts we take pictures. Some of the stuff that had been given to her are handmade so there is no way of really placing value on that.

What it all comes down to , these people are being vendictive because they knew I had lost my job of 5 years and trying to find another so they felt that it was time to give me a low blow of doing this right now. They have never brought up child support until I told them no to the adoption. But if a court wants to make me pay back child support so be it. I'll do it with a smile because I know I have a lot more rights once it's all on paper and they won't be able to pull the stunts they have in the past. Not to mention it would give me even more of a pot to pee in as far as having the gaurdianship terminated.

Sorry this is posted a 2nd time , didn't think anyone seen this after I seen all of your posts because I apparently replied to a different area or something and it stashed this response in the middle so couldn't tell if it was a new post or not...