I'm out of state with no custody order what do i need to do to protect myself?

[shay4712]

i have had my daughter all her life and 5 yrs ago we moved out of state he knew where we were but never contacted until the end of last yr. so after long conversations with him and my daughter we decided to let my child go live with her father for the year. she is 13 and wanted the chance to get to know him again and his 3 other daughters. she's in school there and he's been ignoring me and not sending report cards and doesnt tell me things about when picture day is so i can get pictures too. I've tried to keep on his good side because there is no custody order in place only a order or support to me from him which i only see once a year when i get whats left of his taxes after i wait another 6 months because he doesnt work only wife works and they file married in order to pay off his support to the state once a year in one lump sum, i may get 190.00 only after 6 more months goes by in which the next tax season is alomst here again.  i don't know if it gets nasty again with him and i,  if he will move change his number or both...so does anyone know what i should do?
thanks in advance
shannon:-)

[shay4712]

he has my daughter in ks. now and i'm in az. i'm scared because i don't have anything in writting to say i have residential custody ... i don't know if he has her for a year wether or not he can take her from me and get custody himself.
anyone know what i should do?
helllllllp??????????/
shannon

[rm1759]

Is there any court order whatsoever?

Usually it takes 6 months to establish residency... (although that differs from state to state)

If she's living with dad why are you still getting support?

[Kitty C.]

No, it does NOT differ from state to state.  It's a federal act called the UCCJA - Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction Act - meaning that any state that a child has been a resident of for a minimum of 6 months, that state has jurisdiction over that child.

[shay4712]

only getting when they can collect anything he owes almost 6yrs worth back pay and is not to this day current. custody was not ever decided by any court just child support.
she's only been there since June 2004.
Can i goto court here and ask for custdoy if shes with him right now?
thanks again
shannon

[janM]

If the two of you were not married, most states give automatic custody to the mother. However...since she is in school there, it would not be in her best interest to remove her (which legally you could probably do but the child would probably not like the idea). He would have every right to file for custody since the child has been with him and thriving, and ask that you pay to support her. But he would have to do it in your state, since she has not been there 6 months yet. She is old enough to state her preference to the judge but it would still be up to him unless you live in Georgia, where the child's wishes are frequently honored.

I don't agree with him not keeping you informed about school issues. You should arrange with her school to send you copies of everything directly. And since there is no court order, he does not have to allow you contact with her. If you wanted her to stay with him, you could agree to a custody change and file a parenting plan that would allow you to enforce the contact and visits.

Why do you want custody back at this time?

[shay4712]

i do not want to take her away from him I'm just trying to cover myself in case he's up to no good again. i wanted to know if i should get court involved before things get nasty just to cover my own butt.
 i have already this a.m. been in contact with her scool and they were wonderful and are going to help me keep informed...already got check in mail for her picture re-take on the 12th. along with 10 self addressed envelopes.
i just want to make sure that at the end of this school year she comes back home to start high school the last 4 yrs all at her school here with all her friends.
thanks again
shannon

[rm1759]

>No, it does NOT differ from state to state.  It's a federal
>act called the UCCJA - Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction Act
>- meaning that any state that a child has been a resident of
>for a minimum of 6 months, that state has jurisdiction over
>that child.


I stand corrected, Kitty is much more knowledgable than I.

So, after 6 mo, jurisdiction will be there, and if dad doesn't return the child, then you could be in for a fight...

[Lawmoe]

You have created a difficult situation. If no custody order was ever entered and custody has not been determined, either party may file in their state.  Such decisions will be based onwhat is in the child's best interests. In that respect, your past care can be compelling.

To avoid a nasty custtody battle, however, if that is even possible, you must memorialize the agreements of the parties as part of a stipulation and court order and file that with the court