Has any other father tried to reverse custody order and won?

[StacyD]

I am a 37 year old Father of three great kids, the mother has custody of all 3 of my children, my oldest is not biologically mine, I did not wish to split up the siblings as they were all young, and still are, so I granted custody to the mother of my two biological children, the oldest, who is hers from another relationship, but mine as she has only known me as her father, is now nine years old, I have been paying maintenance for her for the last 4 years, as well as the others. In the last 2 years, my ex has been fired from 6 jobs, she is now again employed by a bar, working night shifts and not getting home til 4 in the morning, sometimes later, so my kids are in school and daycare through the day, and with babysitters through the night, she chronically smokes marijuana, her power is cut off atleast twice a year as well her phone and cable, she applies money's recieved to bingo, smokes and marijuana prior to paying bills. I wish to seek custody of my children, I have been at the same job for 7 years, the same residence for the last 4 years, I provide a stable environment for my children and they love to be here. I am considering seeking custody of my children, I have discussed it wih my oldest, who wants to stay with her Mom because she really likes the school she is in, at one point I did not wish to split the kids up, and still don't, but I truly believe that the kids should be with me. My relationship with my ex is at best..... terrible, has anyone else tried to gain custody of their children after giving custody away, and does anyone know my chances at this attempt, is there anyone that could provide me with any help in this matter, I have not yet seeked a lawyer, as I am afraid that if I attempt this, and I lose, it will make getting my children that much harder, as it stands now I have generous and reasonable access, Hope this finds all is well who come across this posting. Thanks for any response that I get to this, its greatly appreciated.

[CustodyIQ]

I think if you're able to prove everything you outlined, you would have a reasonable shot at modifying custody.

By proof, it means not just your opinion or suspicions.

You would have to build your case upon evidence and credible witness testimony.

Your mom is not a credible witness.  A school administrator is.  A doctor is.  A random stranger (who has nothing to gain by supporting you) is also a good witness.

It sounds like if you were to find a decent private investigator to observe the mom for a couple weeks, you could build some really good evidence... outline her work schedule, her recreation schedule, who watches the kids, etc.

It'd be worth researching attorneys and consulting with a good one in your area.

This isn't something you'd want to slap together and take before court on a lark.

It may be several months, building your evidence, before you take it to court.

By the time you approach the court, you and your attorney will know that you have a very good shot to get much of what you ask, so you won't have to worry about retaliation from your ex.

And, if you keep it stealth until then, you can keep going with how you're going (i.e., generous and reasonable access).

I don't know what'll happen with your former stepchild.  An attorney in your area would have to tell you what rights, if any, you may have.

[jlwelch]

I have just one suggestion.  My husband and I are going through the 2nd custody battle for his child in three years.  If you know that she is smoking pot.  Call the Department of Children and Family Services.  Tell them nothing about your intention of custody.  They have to drug test her without warning in like 24 hours.  That is your best bet.  Then she has an open child welfare case.  We have not won our case yet.  But it looks promising this time.  Keep your fingers crossed

[lookinnomore]

Sounds like our situation, we got lucky and BM gave the boys to him one of the many times her power was cut off.

Have you tried asking her for them? Have you tried calling Social Services when you know there are no utilities on in the house thats NOT a fit enviroment for kids to live in.  If she is smoking pot on a regular basis you could call that in as well.  May sound mean......... but....... whats in the best interest of your children?  Ever hear of a contact buzz?

Dads win more and more everyday.  

[onedaddy]

We are currently involved in a trial to reverse custody from BM that is a year and a half in the making, but will be well worth it in the end.

Our mess all began after BM remarried and wanted to accommodate SF by moving 90 miles away, stupidly DH agreed and each would share the driving.  Well BM no longer wanted tro drive and decided to make up a slew of lies to ask for supervised visitaton and this way DH would drive in both directions.  Well everything back fired she had him arrested 2x, the judge said there was serious issues with her credible.  She called CPS, the said there was a lack of credible evidence, she ordered a forensic evaluation, he said she coached the kids is severly sociopathic, BPD and Anti-social and reccomended a change in custody.  All this with the help of some serious digging on my part.

You see, you must have all the proof in hand.  We have hundreds of back-up and never come to court or an evaluation without our 2 stuffed filing folders.  Begin to tape record converstion, try and communicate in written form, do  background checks on your BM, be it criminal, financial, school, doctor reports, etc.    

[Peanutsdad]

Yes, my ex started out with custody. After a year fight, I won custody of my then 1.5 yr old daughter.


So, to answer your question, yup dads do when. Not often, but we are not quite in the two headed freak catagory. ;)