Help/information sought

[ocean]

If you liked the counselor, go back and tell them the new stuff and then you will have this person say that BM was not cooperative in the past and see if she is willing to come now. The bottom line is she cant choose one of her kids over the other. It is one thing if they are teenagers and going through a phase but they are young! Why does she favor the one?

[stepmom2b]

To be honest and I don't mean to sound crass - the older child strokes her ego (tells her what she wants to hear-agrees with everything she says).  The younger child has stood up for himself and she doesn't like it.  He calls her on her lies (which are numerous) and that really upsets her!  The other issue is between the child and her live-in boyfriend; they do not get along at all and we think that the boyfriend made her choose between him and her child.  She picked her boyfriend.  She doesn't work and is right now pregnant with a 3rd child from this guy so she pretty much needs him to survive.

The two boy's personalities are very different - one is the peacekeeper/maker and the other more of the rebel.  The younger child has some personality traits like his mother which I'm sure doesn't help - they are butting heads all the time.  She likes everyone to praise her and agree with everything she says or does; regardless if it is right or wrong..... It's been wonderful having to deal with her, lol!

You are right tho.  A normal person would not choose one child over another but we are not talking about a normal person with normal feelings/reactions.  That may sound harsh to some but unfortunately it is the truth.

I talked with fiance and we are getting him back into counseling.  He's talking with the school for recommendations - the person we went to before has moved on and is no longer in this area.  We wish we could go back there - she was wonderful and those are hard to find!  Thanks for everyone's help - I guess we were going to wait and see but now know that probably isn't the right way to handle this situation.  We can only keep moving on and hope the drama ends someday soon!