Infidelity before seperation

[joerod77]

I need some serious advice. Here's my background: I am currently seperated from my wife, I moved out in late June, soon after, two months later my wife tells me she is pregnent with another guy's baby. She says her baby with this guy is due in March 06. She looks pretty big and everyone that sees her says she is farther along than she says she is. This being said. If she ends up having this other man's baby before march wouldn't this proove infidelity on her part and are these grounds for me to get my 4y/o son for my full custody?

[bestmom2sd]

i hate to break it to you but that is not grounds for getting custody of your child. I know it sucks but that is the truth.  but the good thing is that you won't have to pay her alimony.  custody is based on what is in the childs best intrest.  I would contact a father's right organization where you are at and file for custody.  Me personally would file for joint custody(legal, and physical).  That way if she files for full custody it will look bad on her.Good luck

[CustodyIQ]

I strongly STRONGLY recommend that you consult with an attorney and also purchase the book "Win Your Child Custody War" by Hardwick.

You're completely off-base as to what matters in child custody, and that is your biggest enemy.

Further, if it's true that your wife got pregnant well before you moved out, you may also find yourself having to fight to prove that the second child isn't yours.

So, you ask for SERIOUS ADVICE.

My serious advice is to spent every waking moment at this point educating yourself about family law and child custody.

You are already at a huge disadvantage having moved out of the home four months ago.  I assume that your son primarily lives with the mother in the familial home.

One of the biggest contributors to a court's ruling is the status quo.  The status quo that you have created is that the child lives primarily with the mother.

If you want sole custody, you're really screwing up your strategy.

Harsh words, but important ones.

Good luck.

[Genie]

in IL, infidelty has no bearing on anything.  I recently divorced b/c of my ex's affair.  Judge didn't care or comment on it at all.  If he had tried for custody it would've had no bearing at all on the outcome. Sometimes I have heard of the judge ordering the person the affair with to not have contact with the children until divorce is final but that is about it.

So if your state is no fault like mine, it won't matter one bit.  Sorry. What could matter is the BF and his background. If a criminal or abuser or addict.  But even then it depends on the state.

[ravenx329]

what custody IQ said is pretty much right on target. Don't worry about the matter that your wife cheated on you. That should be the least of your worries. Start keeping a log about your activities with your child, and what you do during the day, and what she does etc. You are on a plain and you want a mountain so you better start with a mole hill. Focus on nothing but the best interest of your child, and make sure that the kid she is carrying is not your, because if she came right out and told ya, yet she is further along than what she says it could be yours. better safe than sorry.

   Hope I helped a lil bit and good luck,
                         Jason