I am completely in the dark here, please advise.

[Lunchbox]

My child's mother has been sick both physically and mentally for nearlytwo years. It was so bad she asked me to stop working and stay home totake care of her and our child. I have been my daughter's only realcaregiver for the entirety of her life. her mother and I were eaking byon her welfare for quite some time and things just got worse andworse.  She would beg me to stay home and take car of her whenever Iwould mention going to look for work. Our lives had deteriorated intocomplete crap and the only thing I had to look forward to were her weeklong hospital stays so I could get a moment's rest. She has been in andout of the psyche ward for suicide attempts and a prescriptionnarcotics dependency issue.

After a year and a half of not beingable to get any kind of day care through the state(we weren't marriedand I was not on her case even though we lived together. I have afelony record, one time offense that has always haunted me.) and notbeing able to get her family or my mother to help us out, she finallystarted talking to her parents behind my back about gettting some help.They have always taken a disliking to me becuase I was 30 and she was20 when we met so they told her if she left me and took our child theywould get her help and a lawyer and new insurance so her medical issueswould be cleared up.

She went into the psyche ward and wasdiagnosed with borderline personality disorder, OCD, and bi polar withsevere mood swings. She was deemed a suicide risk. When she was inthere she conspired with her family to leave me once she got out andshe called me and dumped me via a social worker intermediate. She toldme she was leaving so she could work on being independent and that itwas a good thing for both of us. I knew better. She told me she wasgoing to come back to me once things were better, I knew better.

Shegot out, took my daughter to her parents house, and has not spoken tome since she left. I have been refused access to my daughter for abouttwo months now. We were never married but my name is on the birthcertificate and on the paternat registry and my daughter has my lastname. In the mean time the child's mother has been in and out of thepsyche ward and given electroconvulsive therapy treaments to quelch hermental issues. She has been on suicide watch while in there forthreatening to kill herself. Now that she is out she is the only personwith our child for upwards of 10 hours a day while her parents are atwork. She is still unable to take care of herself let alone ourdaughter, yet her family thinks it's okay to leave them alone. I havebeen desperately looking for work since we split ways but it has beenhard to find anything since the economy is bad and I have a felonyrecord. My record is 8 years old with nothing on it since then. I amonly allowed to speak to my daughter via phone for a couple of minutestwice a week. I have been threatened with a restraining order if I callmore than that. I am being threatened by the CSEA to have my licenseremoved since I am two motnhs behind on my payments, a total of 450.00in all. I have no money for an attorney. I am losing my mind here. Ineed to see my daughter. What should I do? I am terrified I will neversee her again or I will only be able to see her for a few hours a weekin the supervision of someone while I pay outrageous amounts for a kidI never spend time with. I will never be able to get ahead in my ownlife as I will be paying to allow her to sit on her ass at home and donothing. What should I do?

When I say I have no money I mean I am eating bread and baloney. I really have NO MONEY right now. Please help.

Brian

[Lunchbox]

bump for an answer.