Amicable situation- Need to change Primary Physical Custodian

[ocean]

How did it go today?
No passports! Get the order to return children at the end of the visit. Start collecting records of kids being with you if she files for custody by you. If she files anywhere else, you should ask for a dismissal as the children have not lived with her.

If you get kids back, no more visits until you have new court orders. Call the kids school and say you do not allow transfer papers to new school. You can ask for that in your motion. Children will remain in same school until trial.

[4mykids]

How did it go today?
No passports! Get the order to return children at the end of the visit. Start collecting records of kids being with you if she files for custody by you. If she files anywhere else, you should ask for a dismissal as the children have not lived with her.

If you get kids back, no more visits until you have new court orders. Call the kids school and say you do not allow transfer papers to new school. You can ask for that in your motion. Children will remain in same school until trial.

Once again, thank you for the invaluable info. Tried to get a hold of several attorneys yesterday with secretaries letting me know to expect
a call the next day (today). I wonder if these are things I can just file on my own.

[ocean]

Yes, you can file on your own. See if a lawyer calls you back today. Tell them you need to file an ex parte (emergency) hearing. If you do not get anyone, you can file yourself and then hire a lawyer to deal with the hearing.

You want the children returned immediately, that the children can not be taken from current school district. (ask and see how you will enforce it- will the sheriff help you? You need strong wording to get children back). Ask one of the lawyers for advice on what to go down an file and then you will hire them for the hearings or issues surrounding their return.

Good luck today If you get to the family court intake unit early, you should see a judge today or get a ruling by tomorrow.

[4mykids]

Yes, you can file on your own. See if a lawyer calls you back today. Tell them you need to file an ex parte (emergency) hearing. If you do not get anyone, you can file yourself and then hire a lawyer to deal with the hearing.

You want the children returned immediately, that the children can not be taken from current school district. (ask and see how you will enforce it- will the sheriff help you? You need strong wording to get children back). Ask one of the lawyers for advice on what to go down an file and then you will hire them for the hearings or issues surrounding their return.

Good luck today If you get to the family court intake unit early, you should see a judge today or get a ruling by tomorrow.

Well here's what's happened and honestly so far and it doesn't look good. After calling several law firms one
attorney manage to return my call yesterday and informed me that since I willingly gave the children to my
ex-wife (even to go on vacation) that to file an ex parte now would mostly like yield fruitless results. He
went on to explain that it's because I obviously didn't believe they were in any apparent danger.

Then he went on to tell me I could file a parenting agreement with a judge and that judge could order our
children to stay with me until the trial. He said it depends on which judge I get. He also mentioned (as you guys did)
that the fact that they were with me for the past year an half (nearly two school years) would hold some water.

He then went on to break down his expenses (3000.00 dollar retainer, he bills at 200.00 an hour and rarely
has he done a case where he has NOT gone through the 3000.00 retainer and require more). He then gave an
easier number to reach him at.

I realized I'd be forking over some dough for the service and it's worth it, but it's just going to be quite
a sum in the end with me not even feeling all that confident about getting them back.

I'm also awaiting comments or legal advice from an ex-husband (whom I've met and got along with) of one
of my friends. She say's he's one of the best family law attorneys in the state and has been in my
position with an ex (not her). We'll see what happens as I called him yesterday and supposedly she
has communicated with him on my behalf as well. Also if he's that busy and that good this could cost me
a small fortune.

I'm researching and prepping for tomorrow to at least file what I can on my own.
I'm trying to get all my ducks in a row before I go to downtown to initiate paper work. It's been extremely
trying as I still work a great portion of the day (I normally begin work between 4:30 and 6:30am), but I'm
off at 1pm tomorrow and plan to head directly to the courthouse. Although I love my job and am blessed to
work alongside some incredible individuals (both coworkers and clients alike) I am constantly thinking about my children.
In my heart I believe that other than taking me out of their lives she loves them and would do no harm them.
Though I'm in terrible pain (and I realize it's not all about me) I have some peace of mind knowing she loves them.

I am sad, but feel that I am strong. I'm trying to look at the big picture (trying to see what is right for our kids).
Maybe I'm missing something. My father left me a message (I keep missing him because of work) saying the kids may
eventually see what they have/had in me and return. Regardless I must stay strong for them and for me. I'm not
sure if I really believe this or if I'm trying to convince myself of this. I want to believe it.  It sounds good though...huh? 
Either way I needed to write it out. Okay, I'm tearing up a bit so I'm out.

Once again, I sincerely thank all of you for your help and advice.
Prayers and Luck to all of you (especially to those in my situation or one like it). STAY STRONG!
Paul

[ocean]

Do not hire the first one...they are not into fighting the fight.

If you file yourself, put in something like, "father has had custody of children here in XX since XX. Children went to visit mom on XX. On XX date, mother has said she will not return children to their home/school. Mother is asking for their passports. Father fears mother will take children out of the country and not return them on as she stated in an email dated XX. Father requests the courts to order the children back to home state (father's custody) and that the children not be allowed to be discharged from current school district (name school here)"

You need to file the ex parte (emergency hearing). NOT a change of custody/visitation.  Some places you will see a judge that day. Some places you get a decision the next day (especially if you are going so late). Here the courts are closed from 1-2 so call and ask before you rush there at 1.

Good luck! Maybe you can talk to the other lawyer in AM and just say what you are doing and get some advice and hire someone later...

[4mykids]

Thanks again for the quick response Ocean! I'm getting everything in order right now so
I'm prepared to give it my best shot tomorrow. Thanks for the help with the wording and
such.

I'll wait for my buddies friend or try him again in the am. I need to make the first step
regardless tomorrow. Thanks for the hope!

[ocean]

any update?

[4mykids]

any update?

Yes. Thanks for asking,

I guess every state is different because here in MT they had me go from the courthouse over to the public library's
self help floor to get info, advice and paperwork to fill out the Ex-parte and Proposed Order forms. And then the folks
at the library gave me info along with website info and informed me that I could go to the mtgov site to fill out the info, send it
or save it and return to the library and they would print it then help me get it to the judge.

This is more complicated then I thought yet well worth the effort. I'm working on it now and hoping to have it done by
father's day (how ironic) and be prepared to turn it in on mon.

I guess we'll see.

Thanks again for your help and encouragement.

[4mykids]

Okay, I told you guys I'd update so here it is. My ex still has the kids (it's been 5 weeks now), has filed for child support and wants to come down to collect the rest of the children's things (including birth certificates and passports). I guess I'll have to pony up the 2000 to 25000 it takes retain a lawyer.  I did attempt to file the Ex-parte and proposed order forms, but between the good folks at the library (I do believe they tried), my own lack of experience and the courts giving me the old "run around" (I went back and fourth several times) my attempts were fruitless.

I'll update again later.

Once again, thanks for all your help.

[MixedBag]

She can get her own copy of the birth certificates -- and keep the passports until ordered to turn them over.

UGH!