Joint custody and keep BM from moving out of state!

[Ryanniche]

Hello, my name is Ryan and here is my situation. My girlfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, and we found out we were pregnant within a month of being together. We moved from Florida to Georgia right before the baby was born, and in August, we had a beautiful baby girl. Both myself and my girlfriend agreed that we wanted her to be a stay at home mom, and my job pays well enough to allow that. Now 6 months later, she has decided that she wants to move back to her hometown in TN to live with her grandparents and go to college. Being that it's not right down the street, rather 5 1/2 hours away from me, I find this a problem. She insists that since she has been the stay at home parent, that our daughter is better off living with her, and that while she is going to school her grandparents will take care of our daughter, while if our daughter lived with me here in Georgia, she would be in daycare for about 50 hours a week while I am at work. I have spoken with a few attorneys who have said that I first need to establish paternity and legitimacy of the child being mine, and from there file for joint custody. I do not want to be one of these fathers that sees their child every other weekend for two days, and be a visitor. Should I file for sole custody, and if so, what are my chances of it being granted? I don't have a lot of money to spend on a lawyer, but a lot of people have said that it is the best way to guarantee my time with my daughter. Help me please!

[mistoffolees]

Take your lawyer's advice and move quickly. You need to prove paternity first. After that, go for custody.

It's up to you what you do, but you have a few options:

1. If you sue for sole custody (and win), you get to decide where the child lives.

2. If you get joint custody and there are no other restrictions in the custody agreement, either party can move wherever they want.

3. You could go for joint custody, BUT have wording in the agreement that the child can not be moved out of state without both parents' permission.

Sounds like you'd be happy with #3, but your lawyer might suggest that you need to ask for #1 in order to negotiate a solution.

Warning: If she moves now, your clock is running. After 6 months, the child's residence will be the new address and you'll have a hard time changing it. Also, the longer she's away from you, the weaker your arguments will be.

Good luck.