Daughter cut her wrists

[deezo1975]

Hi all,

I'm seeking some help, my daughter is 12 years old, she recently cut her wrists in what is believed to be a cry for help. She's very introverted so it's hard to say what's really eating her inside, I'm suspecting from what she's said to me that it's about it the relationship she has with her mother, as well as the fact mom & I don't have good communication. My daughter did say that her mom is all about her new relationship and spends pretty much all of her time with the guy ignoring the girls.

A little background: 2 daughters, ages 12 & 8, with mom Mon-Wed, me on Thurs (overnight) and every other weekend. Mother is in new relationship and my daughter told me that her mom is all about herself and her new boyfriend. Mom doesn't cooperate with me very well, frequently denies me access to the girls, I attempt to call daily but she'll ignore my phone calls or my requests via text messages to speak to the girls. She's also left me off of the emergency card while adding her new boyfriend on it instead. She doesn't communicate school/extracurricular activities very well, I go directly to school myself, however there are still important things to discuss regarding kids school activities and she'll just flat out ignore me. When we do talk, everything is a conflict with her, she yells, she calls me names (in front of girls too). Oh and last summer she was arrested for domestic battery for hitting me, which the court later deemed to be a one time event and not rising to the level of a change in circumstances (family law courts are so flawed -- or I didn't have a good enough attorney).

What I'm seeking: I want more time with the girls, I'm shooting for another day a week, so it'd be Wed/Thurs with me, mom can be with them Mon/Tues. I'm also wanting to get us into co-parenting therapy, I was going to file for an emergency hearing to get immediate therapy for my daughter, but was finally able to get mom to agree, so I didn't need the emergency hearing after all.

One thing I'm torn about is if I immediately file for a change in visitation or wait to go thru therapy first to see if we can resolve.

I know that my daughters would want and can benefit from having more time with me. My daughters are afraid enough of their mother not to really tell her how they feel, I believe that they're feelings are being suppressed. Mom has shown traits of either bipolar, borderline or narcissistic personality orders (or all of the above really).

Anyone have any tips/suggestions? This is in San Bernardino County (Southern California).

Thanks in advance...
D