Issue with ex

[OneMan]

I'm not sure what to make of this and thought others might have some experience. I have posted before on other topics.

I have a teenaged child. The ex and I have been apart for more than 10 years. Time is shared equally.

I've found out that Mom told our child that Dad "hates" her. That's the extent of what I heard and I don't know if it was once or more than once. I didn't quiz my child. The context was me saying her sister didn't need to buy a small item that I was planning to pick up later. In other words, a logistical question of relatively minor importance. Ex's reaction to my plan was, "Your Dad hates me."

I don't know what to make of this and just thought, "This is disproportionate to what was going on and pretty extreme." I've certainly never said anything to my child about hating her. Not even close. I know very little of what she says to the young one and I don't ask. Historically, ex has been extremely combative with me verbally, but usually not around our kid. But this got my attention.

For my child's sake, I may go speak to a professional about this because I find it strange and scary. Ex has said other odd things in the past that I've heard about but not this dark. Maybe it's nothing and will pass. That's what I'm trying figure out. Thanks.

[MixedBag]

I believe Divorce Poison's answer is to this situation is to ask the child -- "Well, what do you think?" to encourage the child to think and develop their own thoughts independent of Mom.

Divorce Poison is an awesome book....

[OneMan]

Thanks. That's a very smart reply.

[OneMan]

...and will check out that book that I'm unfamiliar with.