Can Custodial Parent Deny Visitation to Non Custodial parent???

[looking4justice]

Hi there,

   I am brand new to this forum I found you while trying to do some research on the net about the question I am posting about.  I am the "step-mom" and  I am pretty fed up with my husbands EX.  She has given us problems in the past but now she is denying us our court approved weekend visit.  Why should you ask????  Well it seems that she has plans and needs my step son (15 yrs) to baby sit her 2 year old son.  Does that seem like a good enough reason for us not to be able to have our regularly scheduled visit?  I am so PO'd because we only get to have this child every other weekend which turns out to be a mere 4 days a month...unless of course the mom has plans that don't include the boy and she needs to pawn him off on someone or needs us to pick him up or drop him off places...how convenient!  I am tired of being used and on top of that not having any say in when we get to see him.  Can any one advise???

I found this on the net and wondered what exactly do you do to file for an enforcement?

"THE CUSTODIAL PARENT KEEPS INTERFERING WITH MY VISITATION... DO I HAVE ANY RIGHTS?

Yes, concealment by the custodial parent can result in suspension of child support and reversal of custody. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS DOCUMENT INTERFERENCE WITH VISITATION, AND FILE FOR ENFORCEMENT EVERYTIME IT HAPPENS. There are other legal enforcement's available for a parent's refusal to comply with a child visitation order. You can file a motion to compel a custodial parent to conform with an order for visitation."

Thanks to you all!

Tab

[katz]

Is this consistant or often? Are you allowed make up time? If not then yes document everytime dh is denied visitation.

At 15 does the boy want to have visitation? That would be something that *I* would want to weigh in my mind, before attempting court. It seems that courts would take the 15 year olds opinion into consideration, and wouldnt risk alot of money to fight what may be unwinable.

In our situation, both parents are pretty flexible, and make up time is always allowed, or at least considered depending on plans the other parent has. I think this is really the ideal situation, in that each parent can be flexible, because there are issues that come up on both sides ie reunions, weddings, etc that are out of the parental control to an extent. Good luck

[Kitty C.]

One possibilty:  tell BM that you will take the next TWO weekends, since she insisted on using SS for a babysitter for your regular weekend......and BTW, how much did she pay SS for his services??  (Sorry, just being fascitious!)

Is he babysitting ALL weekend?  Or just a few hours on Fri. or Sat. night?

[looking4justice]

We are VERY flexible...In the past we have swaped weekends with her no problem but it just so happens that she is PO's at us because we will not lie down and take her crap...If you want the details here is the story.

My 15 year old Step son is currently living with his mom (custodial parent) while she is living with her boy friend (her 2 year old sons dad) in his house.  She sold the house her and her son were living in and made over 100K but she is crying poverty because she chooses not to work and is supported by both her son's fathers.  Well, my SS is enrolled in a Catholic High School about 15 mins from our house and 45 mins from his moms place.  My SS asked us if he could live here while his mom gets her crap together and gets a bigger/better place to live because right now he does not have a room he lives in a living room and is made to get up at 6am because that is the time the baby is up and the moms boy friend goes to work.  We all know how teenagers love to sleep till noon so he is bothered by not having his own space.  At our home even though he is only here 4 days a month and we have two other children ...he has his own room.  Well DH and I discussed it and I agreed to take him to school every morning and pick him up even though it will be a burden lugging around my 1 & 3 year old at 7 in the morning and then my 4 daycare children in the afternoon.  I felt that if he really wanted to be here then I should make the sacrifice because I would certainly make the sacrifice if it were my own child.. Any way the mom's stipulations were...since we were not going to pay child support becaue he would be living here for the school year then we would have to pay for all of his books, all his tuition, all his uniforms and to top it all of 1500.00 for a bus that would take him to his house.  We agreed to all the terms except for paying for the bus which he would not use because I would take him to school since the bus only takes him to his house not ours .so we had no use for it hence we are not paying 1500.  Well she was PO'd because not her lazy A** would have to drive 50 mins to pick him up on her scheduled weekends if the bus was not availabe so she said NO DEAL!  THis really upsets me that she has so much CONTROL.  THe boy wants to come and she has the right to say NO and why...Because I said so.  NOT FAIR!  Anyway since this occured last week she is beeing a royal PIA to the point where she is causing trouble.  She did not even call us to ask if it was ok to swap weekends she just told her son who inturn told us yesterday that he could not come over because he was babysitting.  Yes, She is paying him but just to apease him so that he does not get mad at her for doing this to him....And then she has the nerve to say she is not selfish.  Ok enough of my ranting...This situation just sticks if we have no recourse and just have to let her call the shots.

[looking4justice]

We would LOVE to tell her we would like to have him the next two weekend but the fact of the matter is that she can just say no and then what?  I don't know the details as to when he is babysitting but he lives an hour away and his mom NEVER picks him up or drops him off so it leaves us with the burden of driving two hours for him which we don't mind but if we have to pick him up Sunda
y morning and drop him off Sunday night that is kind of Bull.

[MixedBag]

If she says no and you want your weekend back, you'll have to ask the court for it.

Based on your other post, you've got bigger issues to hash out -- (school) and I wish you luck.

[looking4justice]

It stinks but I guess we just miss out and that rots!

As for school...If the mom does not want to help then her son will just have to make due with the "room" he has and that is that.  We are not budging on our stance.  I do not think it is unfair for us to ask for help with his school items when she gets support and help.  She would not be paying support or helping with any of his school if he lives here and that is not going to happen.  Too bad for the kid but he is old enough to understand that she is being greedy and if he wants to be here and she does not let him then he will know why.  We just have to let it be because we cannot control what she does.