Supervised Visitation

[Asergea]

Hello All.

After months of waiting for the wheels of Justice to turn in the great state of Nebraska, I'm finally going to see my daughter (Supervised) for the interim, (Between now and when the main Custody case starts)

How much (roughly) do the supervisors cost?
what's the best thing I can do with a superisor watching me for an Hour with my daughter?
what should I expect?

this is for a "Getting to know you" period since it's been almost a year since I last saw my daugher, and have been fighting to ever since.
Any advice would be appreciated.

Thank you

[joni]

my DH paid $75/hr split with the mom.  keep in mind that this supervisor is an objective party, often with a direct line to the judges ear....and the judge will call this supervisor before your case begins and ask about you.

with that in mind......

- NEVER bad mouth your Ex
- keep your appointments, get there EARLY
- don't miss any appointments, even if you're on your death bed
- ask for extra time to visit with your child, especially if you're having fun, even for an extra 10 minutes
- NEVER vent your frustration
- bring games to play with the child, coloring books, books to read, interactive stuff to show that you're an involved parent
- put on your 200%+ happy face
- be affectionate and loving with your child
- bring pictures of your family, like grandparents, step whatevers so the child can learn about the people in your life, even pictures of your and your Ex together in happier times
- after 2 months, ask to formally increase your time to 2 hours, YOU ask to increase your time, don't wait for them to give it to you
- never complain about the money paid to watch you
- be gracious and appreciative to the supervisor for their time and guidance

this is your chance to shine and dispell any myths about yourself

GOOD LUCK!

[CustodyIQ]

How old is your daughter?

[gipsy]

I had stupidvised visits : In my state of frustration And humiliation . I went , It was 100$ Per hour split with the mother "
 Now I will cut  through the fat and too the meat , As I said I was a bit upset with this criminalisation of being a Dad , And the efectiveness of mother;s bogus allegations ,
 , you really have the edge here on this site , BUT Here's what happened
  Mom's trouble makeing behavior became obvious to the people at the stupidvised visit office , And that was reported , And think of this The backwards part is , It was me spending time with the superviser's and I am Basically a likeable guy : And guess what? the supervisor liked me , And in the end the report turned out in My favor , and moms constant problem makeing was reported ,
 SOOO You have a big chance to make a good thing out of part of this ugliness mom has spilled into your life ,
Here are some things that happened ,  
  First I was court ordered like two visits , And then My atty Said "weren't you  Happy to see your son " ?
 Of course I was !
 He said " call the Guardian ad Litem and tell her how excited you are and how you want to see your son more "
 I did this on both visits , Let me tell you the interim report of the Guardian ad Litem looked good ,when the GAL reported My excitement about seeing my son after 11 mo's
  And then I  told the superviser that I had only two visits ordered by the court ,
 And asked the superviser if there would be a way to see if she could ask mom to agree to continue the visits with out a court order !
 The vistation superviser did , And hence returned my call Likeing mom a little less ,
 Also the GAL and the superviser's came over to my house ,On separate occasions . And during this , (somewhow] I was able to forget the ugliness of all this and get along with them quite well , and again My atty' Said " You will have a box of toy's , crib ,and all the things you need to have the child at you house " Won't you ? And I did ,and this was also reported to the court , The end result was because MOM Wouldn't agree to any thing with out a court order , I had to take her to court AGAIN !
 And these are the reports you want ,if you have to take her to court again ,
 So Think of this as an oppurtunity to get good reports , And take out of the house any thing you wouldn't want any one to report to the court , Because they did look around , Not like they were searching ,but they did look on the book shelf and discover I read Mark twain , Loius lamor etc , GOOD BOOKS , And glad there wasn't a copy of Hustler laying around ,
 This is not a big deal , But I pretty Much think you should put away any guns , etc , As you should have locked up with children any way ,
 And if the visits are not home based, after a few see what your atty thinks of moveing the visits ,

This , to me is the courts process , And if you really concentrate on Doing good , And just let the mom continue to the point that it is obvious that she is saying these thiungs in order to interfere , Or legaly , Called "Bad Faith reporting to the court " And these bad faith reports were My argument at trial . I did not win custody , But I believe  I would have  Had a better chance had I realised that this is a process , And if I did not react and talk bad about mom and get into the drama then The court would not have seen It as Mutual problem making , And seen this as My atty agrued the case based on Mom's BAD reporting ,
 Good luck ! stay on the "high road" and be good , Don't volunteer any thing they don;t need to know , Talk about some fun things you have done "

[Genie]

depending on her age, brind some stuff to do.  Maybe some of your favorites books from childhood to read to her.  Or some coloring books to do.  If she is older, then more age appropriate stuff depending on her interests (if you know them). I know being watched will be rough but try to be natural and pretend like they aren't there.

Good luck.  No idea on the fees but I hear they can be really steep.

[Fair_Rulings]

I was only to have supervised visitation for a short time with non-professionals because the mother lied in my case.  Yet no one would listen to me.  Finally I ended up having to hire professionals to monitor after two years and still going.  Once you are being monitored it is hard to stop.  I feel like I'm going to be monitored for life and the monitors don't know why they are monitoring me and I really don't know why I'm being monitored.  The whole thing is crazy, the monitors can't understand why I need to be monitored but the system is so out of whack.  If I can't get a non-professional to monitor for the eight hours a week that I see my child then I end up paying $30.00 to $40.00 an hour here in California.  Focus only on your child not on your ex.  Just be your child's friend, don't talk in negative ways about your ex.  Be prepared to spend, spend, spend money.  I know many others both male and female that are being monitored for no reason other then to supply money to a corrupt system.

[Asergea]

Sorry for the Delay, She's 1 YO.

[sherrie ohio]

My husband had to deal with the supervised visit's about 6 years back.(Due to the fact the mother said his daughter didnt know him and would be scared of him.They didnt take into afect that the reason he hadnt seen her was because of the mother and 1st husband wouldnt allow it.)He took coloring books,stickers a ball on differnt times.He even took pictures of the two of them he had,she liked seeing pictures with her in them.He never asked do you remeber,he just asked her if she'd like to see some pictures he had.And like they say never speak bad of the EX,even if the child brings up something. I dont know about price because the visit's were in the mothers home .  Best of luck! Hang in there for your daughter.