Summer Visitation Question

[prince13]

DH' s daughter is now 15.  We are 4 hours away from the kids. Per the most recent court order her visitation with Dad is 4 weeks during the summer, while her brothers who are 13 and 8 are here for all but 3 weeks.

Well, daughter wants a job and got one. However, they told her she can only have 6 days off during the summer (amusement park type seasonal place), and PBFH is the one who told daughter it was ok. So, now this means Dad won't see her one lick this summer if she accepts the job.

Anyone for any ideas? DH has talked to daughter about this at length, as they have a GREAT releationship despite years of PAS. DH is willing to work around it if he were to get other make up time during the school year, ie days off school, but the problem is that PBFH will never agree to something like that, as it isn't convenient for her. It is all about the court order with PBFH, as long as it only applys to what benefits her.

So, we are looking for some suggestions on this one.

Thanks

[ocean]

Is it a set schedule for work then another 6 days off? Can she take a few days around ger regular days off during the week? (If she had sun and mon off and then took off Tues/wed?) Try to make 2 long weekends out of it? Can you go up there for a weekend?
If she is 15, I would give it a letter a try to the BM. Tell her that SD is now 15 and wants to work so you have arranged a few longer weekends or can come up to her but you also would like memorial day (or whatever). Discuss it with SD first so she can then discuss it BM when she receives the letter.
Good luck!

[prince13]

That is what Dh is trying to work out, but it would be more driving for BM as they meet 1/2 during the summer, but there is no way BM will agree to it. We already know that. Heck, we had an issue last weekend where one son missed the entire weekend due to an out of town church retreat, and BM stated that it wasn't necessary to make up missed-time.

In theory, your idea is GREAT. Unfortunately, BM is not a reasonable individual. I think it is crap that BM is the one that encourage DD to get a job full well knowing that she was to be with her Dad for 4 weeks during the summer.

[MixedBag]

If you have a clearly defined order, I suggest you take BM back to court for contempt after the say.....third violation of the order and not receiving make up time.

It's hard -- but well worth it if you START that was rather than letting issues fester up.

If you don't have a clear order, then go back and get it clarified and THEN follow what I said before.

[prince13]

The order does state very clearly about the 4 weeks visitation with his daughter for the summer. We tried to get her on contempt when she previously denied all weekend visitation in Fall 2003, but she claimed she couldn't make them get into the car with Dad, and the Judge basically agreed with her, so she didn't meet all 3 criteria with contempt.
But, it is worth a try again.


I just wish these women like her would learn and realize the disservice they are doing for their children with all of their BS.