Child Emancipation Help! Long story..

[ShiftingStarlight]

Currently I am in legal custody of my father, and have been since I was 11 when my parents divorced. I am 17 now, and I need help and advice, and figured I may get some answers here. I am a legal resident of Oklahoma, but I want to live in Missouri, and my mother is offering for me to stay here so I can get a start on my own life. At my fathers I have not been allowed a job, or any modes of transportation (it has been forbidden, and I only just learned how to drive a few weeks ago because my grandparents paid for me to take drivers ed), and the only reason I have wanted to keep living there is because I want to graduate school/not leave my fiance behind, seeing as how I only have a year left now in school. I had alot of problems in regular highschool, it was just too large and overwhelming and I was failing. Luckily there was an alternative program that accepted me in February and since then I have almost caught up to the grade I need to be in. It has helped me alot and I haven't wanted to give up an opporotunity that good to help me graduate, so I stayed. But, recently (I am on my allowed months vacation to my mothers) here in Jeff City they are opening their first alternative program and I am already accepted there, after my interview last week. I already know how hard it will be to even "talk" to my father about moving here. He doesn't want to lose out on any of my child support, which I could get him in alot of trouble for. My mother sends him $700 a month and I only see 100 of that. Even worse is that he is 46 years old and still living at his parents house! I have only lived with my father once, and it was when he first got custody of me, so he was ordered to have a place for me to live. It was an apartment and that didn't last more than a few months and I was back living at my Grandparent's. He only moved in there this year, as he had been mooching off anyone that could stand to be his girlfriend and living at their houses. I don't honestly think my father has ever had much of any interest in actually taking care of me in any way, I've lived with my Grandparents since I was 7 years old, and they are so old now that it's getting hard for them.. and I can't say I like living there either. My father has never really supported me in any way, out of kindness or under the law. I'm tired of being used for money that he thinks my mom owes to him (she owes him nothing), and having to live where I'm miserable. I know that he is and has been using my child support for himself and I'm pretty sure drugs as well, and now that living with my mom is possible because of this school I want to get out of Oklahoma as fast as I can! It just seems that after going through alot of webpages that I'm even more confused and Oklahoma doesn't seem to have an emancipation law? I know that my friend there had tried to recently but he had no job so he couldn't. I was wondering what would happen if I tried, and if I would have to go back to that godforsaken state just to do it? My father isn't the easiest or kindest person to talk to and if I asked to stay here even for the rest of summer he would have my mom arrested for kidnapping even if he had told me yes, and all because he would be missing out on another month of money. I'm just so sick of being stuck in this stupid situation and feeling worthless and used. I don't want my mom to have to go to court again and waste all that money if there's something easy that can be done and not near as expensive. It would be stupid to go through all that to change custody when I'm 9 months from being 18. If anyone can help me in any way PLEASE reply. Anyone who read all this is a saint for sure.

[Giggles]

Is to get some counseling.  You've been through a lot in life and it does sound like you're trying to mature and  prepare yourself for the outside world.

2nd..at 17 you should not have a fiance.  Boyfriend..fine, you are much too young to make such a life changing decision such as getting married!!!  I know this by experience.  I married when I was 18 y/o.  Had been with my now X since I was 15, and we were married for 7 years.  When each of us finally "grew up" we realized that we wanted far different things from life.  Thankfully, we were able to remain friends and still get along quite well.  Finish HS, go to college, start your career...THEN consider marriage.  That's something I wish I had done.

As for emancipation at 17...perhaps you should post your questions to Soc?  BUT be sure to follow his posting guidelines.  Keep it short and to the point!

Good luck!!

[VeronicaGia]

"He doesn't want to lose out on any of my child support, which I could get him in alot of trouble for. My mother sends him $700 a month and I only see 100 of that. Even worse is that he is 46 years old and still living at his parents house! I"

What trouble?  You don't get to "see" any of it.  Child support is paid to reimburse the parent for supporting the child.  It is not the child's money.  There is no accountability in child support, so dad could spend it all on beer and no one would do a thing about it.

You are 17, wait it out until age 18 and do whatever you want.  Just make sure that you're ready to leave your father forever, because once you leave you can bet he won't have a place for you to cvome back to.  

Grow up.  you are not ready to become a legal adult.  You do not live on your own, solely support yourself, etc.  Once you're 18, no one can stop you.  If you were mature enough to emancipate, you'd be mature enough to wait the lousey 9 months.