Younger surviving spouse versus stepson

[dipper]

We are in Virginia.  Family member married man 30 years her senior.  He had children her age and older.  She and he had one child together.  He died unexpectedly when child was a year old.  His IRA was not designated for anyone in particular, so bank rules are that wife automatically got that.  

Husband had left his will so that his son would be the overseer of his estate.  Life insurance was left to the four children.

Husband's grown children took ALL of his personal possessions.  they sold his wife one of his vehicles.    

Wife took IRA, which stepson fought, claiming his dad had told him he wanted it to go into estate and divided accordingly.

When wife stood her ground, stepson then counted that as part of her estate.  Stepson is not giving an accounting of how all funds were dispursed.  He 'sold' items for much lower than fair market value.

They are going to court - she to get her part of the estate, and he is fighting this as well as demanding that she has more personal items of his dad's, though he will not list items. She does not have anymore items - she even gave them the man's underwear for goodness sakes.

As the IRA was not written out to be included in estate, any thoughts on how far he will get with that?  

[mistoffolees]

Not a clue - since it will depend on all the wording involved. You need an attorney.