No Show

[korleone23]

I have sole-custody of my four year old son.

We live in Fayette Co., West Virginia

His mother has every other weekend visitation.

We are to meet at the family court house for pick ups.

My son and I sit and wait, every other weekend, and she does not show up.

1. How can I avoid putting him through any more stress of her not showing up?

2. Can I stop taking him to the pick ups due to her not showing up?

[socrateaser]

>1. How can I avoid putting him through any more stress of her
>not showing up?

Write letter to other parent stating the times/dates that she has not shown up. Then state that if she does not appear at the next meeting, that you will file a motion for contempt and to terminate visitation entirely. Send the letter certified so you have proof that she received it.

>2. Can I stop taking him to the pick ups due to her not
>showing up?

No.

[gr8Dad]

I had a problem with my ex not showing for visitation.  After about six weeks(she is ordered to have them every Saturday from 2 to 5PM) of missed visitation, I sent her a letter (RRR, of course) stating that due to her contimued missed visitation, and the undue stress that it caused the children, she would now be required to call to inform me if she was going to be at the visitation exchange.  Keep in mind that I live within 2 minutes of the exchange place, so if she called at 2 PM, i could get there in a moment.

I know, I know, I am PROBABLY in contempt, but I figure that in order for her to get a contempt charge, she would have to show the court that I was denying her the children, to which I would ask, "Have you missed repeated visitations?" and "Have you called to arrange visitation?"  

I think she KNOWS she would look bad, and that the courts would not think it unreasonable, considering how many visitations she HAS missed, that she call first.

[socrateaser]

The legal analysis is, did the defendant, with knowledge of a valid, enforcable court order, willfully and with conscious disregard, violate the order. You are apparently court ordered to transfer the child at date, time and location certain, and you are now stating that you intend to do otherwise. You further state that you can be at the transfer point within 2 minutes, and that you have sent notice to the other parent that she will be "required" to provide notice of her appearance at the exchange point.

You have no authority to modify the orders on your own, reasonable or not. The question is not whether you can be available at the exchange point within two minutes, the question is will you be there? As long as you notify the other parent that you will be available at the exchange point within a reasonable time of her call with the child (e.g., 15 min or less), then you probably are ok. But, if she shows up and calls and you and the child are not available to go to the transfer point, then you are definitely in contempt, assuming that she can prove you weren't available (usually, hard to do).

You can certainly counter complain with a contempt motion of your own, for each of her prior violations, but, this will be equally difficult for you to prove.

As a practical matter I doubt whether either of you will get a contempt against the other, but it is possible, and the more correct approach is notify the court that the other parent is routinely failing to exercise visitation according to the orders, and either ask for a contempt, or merely ask that the court modify the orders so that you do not need to be at the transfer point unless the other parent calls you in advance to notify you that you she will appear.