A few ?'s. I need some advice!!!

[Jankins13]

Hello,

I am 27 and getting divorced. My soon to be ex and I are in total agreement on everything. We have an 8 year old son together. We are getting Joint custody. I work 20 hours a week and earn 1200 per month, BM works 40 and earns around the same. I pick my son up almost everyday from school and watch him until BM gets off work, and I have him most of the weekends. BM does not want and/or need child support money from me. We have agreed to split any major costs that come up, but for the most part BM and my son are doing better than when we were together (They live with a new boyfriend in a big house now). Anyway here is the kicker: I do not have any medical insurance, BM has insurance through here job and our son is on DSHS insurance. Now I was told that they will make me pay child support no matter what, and they will take money out of that. BM will help me with whatever it takes, to try and not get them to take money from me because she knows that it will break me for sure.  Here are some of my questions:

1.   If she is not requesting money will anyone even care?? Will they make me pay anyhow???

2.   If we are getting divorced, and she is not requesting child support, than how would DSHS even know that we got divorced? If we don't tell them, how would they know?

3.   Would it be a good idea for me to get him on some sort of insurance? I could get some insurance through my work and then get him on it, but how much it all that going to cost?

4.   Now another thing is, I am a contract worker, and I have 3 months (at least 100 days, sometimes more) of unemployment every year. During that time I watch my son a lot, but my income is very, very low. Would it be a good I idea to wait until I am unemployed to get all the papers in, and then they will just go off my unemployment income?

5.   Will they actually go off my unemployment income, or will they say I am purposely under employed?? (Now remember my wife is not requesting the child support so no one is really pushing them to do anything.)

[Peanutsdad]

>Hello,
>
>I am 27 and getting divorced. My soon to be ex and I are in
>total agreement on everything. We have an 8 year old son
>together. We are getting Joint custody. I work 20 hours a week
>and earn 1200 per month, BM works 40 and earns around the
>same. I pick my son up almost everyday from school and watch
>him until BM gets off work, and I have him most of the
>weekends. BM does not want and/or need child support money
>from me. We have agreed to split any major costs that come up,
>but for the most part BM and my son are doing better than when
>we were together (They live with a new boyfriend in a big
>house now). Anyway here is the kicker: I do not have any
>medical insurance, BM has insurance through here job and our
>son is on DSHS insurance. Now I was told that they will make
>me pay child support no matter what, and they will take money
>out of that. BM will help me with whatever it takes, to try
>and not get them to take money from me because she knows that
>it will break me for sure.  Here are some of my questions:
>
>1.   If she is not requesting money will anyone even care?? Will
>they make me pay anyhow???

Some courts will, some will let a no cs agreement stand. It's extremely court dependant.
>
>2.   If we are getting divorced, and she is not requesting child
>support, than how would DSHS even know that we got divorced?
>If we don't tell them, how would they know?

the answer is they wont unless one of you opens a case file with them.
>
>3.   Would it be a good idea for me to get him on some sort of
>insurance? I could get some insurance through my work and then
>get him on it, but how much it all that going to cost?
>

Yes its a good idea,, no way of telling you what it will cost.

>4.   Now another thing is, I am a contract worker, and I have 3
>months (at least 100 days, sometimes more) of unemployment
>every year. During that time I watch my son a lot, but my
>income is very, very low. Would it be a good I idea to wait
>until I am unemployed to get all the papers in, and then they
>will just go off my unemployment income?


Filing the papers doesnt mean the case will be finished anytime soon. Never is for the most part. Besides, IF a child support case is opened, more than likely they wil want income tax records for verification of salary due to you being contract labor with periods of unemployment.
>
>5.   Will they actually go off my unemployment income, or will
>they say I am purposely under employed?? (Now remember my wife
>is not requesting the child support so no one is really
>pushing them to do anything.)

Once again, no way to predict.  BUT if your wife opens a file for child support, yes you will have to pay even when on unemployment,, unless you file for a reduction at that time. It seems as tho the reductions are whimsical for the most part. One case worker will insist you are voluntarily underemployed,, and then deny the reduction,, another will not have a problem with it. OR if your state requires a judges signature to modify child support,, heck, its the same story again.
>

[KAT]

Do a search of this site under "Parenting Plans". There are several available. This will help you spell out an agreement which in most cases is likely to be signed by the judge (& then becomes a court order). To cover yourself, download the free *Parenting Time Tracker*. Keep it updated daily so if it ever comes down to support you have proof of how much time you are spending with your son & how much you are supporting him financially....she could even end up owing you.
Good Luck!
KAT