Child support/custody

[Renee]

We have tried going to a mediator and she flipped out.  We were asking for 50/50 custody and my husband said she started cussing and pacing around the room and asking the midiator if there was a chance for that to happen.  It isn't a matter that she thinks we are not good parents or that she would lose time with them but it is that she would lose the money.  I know this  because of her track record of spending time with the kids and how often she used to let us have them when she didn't think we would modify cs.  After we attempted to modify she just quit letting us have them and either had them stay at friends houses or a neighbor.  Looking back the time we have with them is worth more than the money but it was hard to pay for everything plus pay her cs when we literally had them almost all the time.  Like I said hind sight is 20/20 and we should have struck when we had the chance because it didn't make things easier on the kids in the long run.  Also, after that mediation we found ourselves with false accusations made against us.   If somebody told me that another human could be so evil especially when it involves her own children I wouldn't have believed them.  I never knew that one person could delight so much in seeing other suffer or being capable of the things she has done.  As I said before her own father referred to her as an emotional terror.  

We do appreciate the support and the helpful information.  Sometimes little tips help on how to overcome people like her, especially when it is affecting the most precious people in our lives.   God Bless

[mistoffolees]

What did the mediator say when she started acting up?

By the way, she can't legally keep you from seeing the kids when it's your time. I'd put a stop to that immediately. If you're scheduled and she won't let you see the kids, call the police.

[Renee]

My husband told me that she had started pacing around the room cussing and asking if that would happen and the mediator told her to stop cussing, sit down, and they could all talk rationally.  Apparently,she didn't like that because she cussed all the way to the door and slammed it behind her when she left.  The mediator then told my husband he would have to pay for the entire session and that  she would walk him out and watch him drive away so that his ex couldn't accuse him of anything.  She is famous for that.  Anyway, when he was getting into the car she had apparently waited for him to come out and then drove down the street by our car and flipped him off.  I thought we were all adults!  She has also done that many times. in front of the kids.  That is the sad part.  They should never be exposed to those things.  When we went to court over her false accusations the mediator did supply us with a letter showing that two weeks prior to the accusations there was a failed mediation in which 50/50 custody was brought up.  The investigators said they new it was a custody issue from the start but that they have to do their jobs.  

She has decided that she just wouldn't bring the kids over for their scheduled visitation.  One of the times was for her current husbands Birthday. We had plans to take them to a Christmas party at the school but she kept them to celebrate his birthday.  She wouldn't pick up the phones and she said that she didn't get the email saying that we already had plans and it was our scheduled visitation. She contradicted herself many times about the email and we knew it was a lie.  In fact, we decided that it is best to just assume she is always lying.    And, it wasn't that we didn't want them to be there on his birthday because we didn't know it was his birthday until the next day.  Even so, my husband had the right to have them on his scheduled day.  We did call the police and they said unless someone is being threatened there isn't anything they could do and that we would have to take it before the judge and get her for contempt of court.  It seems no matter what we do we are just banging our heads against the wall.

We also just found out that she had her tubal reversed (where she got the money for that we will never know.....hmmmmm) and that she is now pregnant with her current husband's child (who we have heard from a mutual source that he wants out of the marriage and he is bisexual so he doesn't want to be with just her) and she doesn't even take care of the kids she has.  I feel so bad for that baby.  Also, she isn't working and so now she won't ever work (my husband said that when he was married to her she kept wanting kids and that was her excuse to not work) and so the $1200 a month that we give her definately won't go for my husbands bio children but will help her be a stay at home mom to her new baby because the other kids are all in school all day.  I feel bad for all the kids because this is a bad situation for all of them.

Sorry I get to rambling on.  Sometimes it helps to get frustrations out by typing it......I guess nobody is forced to read these.   I also apologize for not using more abbreviations , I am still new.  Thanks again for any tips and we will take all the advice we can get from people who know.  Our lawyer told us that maybe the only way to get her to quit trying to be so deceitful with us and always doing things that will hurt us is to sit and think of ways to give her a taste of her own medicine.  It seems there has to be a better, fair, and more moral way  I am just sorry that there are so many who are in these situations....again, if only it was a perfect world.   God Bless.

[mistoffolees]

I'm not familiar with mediators. Can you bring the mediator into court to testify?

I think you might want to take this up with Socrateaser.