Legal Startegy

[zutalurs]

OK.  So I'm hoping for a little legal advice here.
My attorney has suggested that I bounce his conservative strategy off some other attorneys and see if they agree that what he's doing is in my best interest.
I am a father who wants custody.  Throughout the past year I have been subjected to verbal assualt by the BM's parents, lies, threats, harrassment, and all other manner of things which I believe show the BM is not a good parent and does not offer the best home for our son.
My attorney doesn't want to make a case for requesting custody yet.  He believes we should keep building our case brick by brick, slowly until it is too monumental to deny.
In a way, I agree, but I also fear for the mental and physical well being of my child while we build this case.  I also believe that the older he gets, right now he's just 21 months old, the bigger our case will need to be.  Right now, moving into daddy's house won't be nearly as traumatic for him as it might be when he is 5 years old and has become accustomed to the abuse he receives at home.
Does anyone else have an opinion?  My attorney thinks if we shoot for the moon now and loose that the judge will be biased towards me and always suspect that I am nit-picking at everything the BM does to try and get custody.  I am inclined to disagree, but I promissed him I would feel out some other opinions before asking him to change his strategy.

[gipsy]

 I had a very similar situation, And The problem is this , It seems the abuse is directed at you . And You would have to prove to the court that this is not in the best interest of the child etc, I don't think your atty is way out there it sounds sensible , Maybe what would help is if you were to review admissable evidence that would sway the court your way with your atty , And you may find that you don't have much because he said she said " You abused the Dad "  Usually isn't evidence it's hearsay .  My case went to trial and there was very little mud slinging , And little questions about what she was doing when I was on the stand , But I believe the judge had a reasonable perception of the situation.
    Maybe disuss settling out of court , And if so. the case would not have been decided by a judge and you could then contest custody later , But it doesn't sound like you have a strong case that say's It will be in the best interest of the child to live with you , You may just start bringing a video camera < (I did) And this puts a stop to a lot of crap at the transfer , And or get a temp parenting plan and leave it at that for a while . And show up for every visit and see if she puts herself in contempt or something , I think for now this is the way it is , this was similar at the same age for my son , I think it say's good things about your atty to be open enough to have you get a second opinion ,