don't know where to turn

[jeffnewdad]

My ex has my baby.
I had paternity test. went to court ,pay for birth and child suport . but she will not let me see my baby. .I go to friend of court and now there is a custody hearing . I would just like to be with my baby girl and don't know what I need to do .I love my little girl and want to be a father but yet the court don't seem to care while they are taking there time. I can't see my liitle girl of 8 month old . can someone tell me what i can do to get here to comply with the court ordered visitation right i have ? and why don't they make her comply?

[ocean]

Hi,
What does your court order state exactly about visitation? Do you have anything yet on paper? If not, you need to wait until the next hearing and then ask for a temporary visitation plan for now. You can find some visitation schedules on this web site. Come up with what you would like to have (and more) before you go. You should be able to get overnights/weekends, time in the summer, holidays...If your work schedule permits, ask for the time you have off. When you make the final plan, be sure to put in there what happens when child becomes school age, times for drop-off and pick-up, exact dates for summer, who does the driving, birthdays, etc...the more you have in there and the easier your life should be. Good luck!

[jeffnewdad]

I have a court signed by judge for 6 days with her and mom is suppose to have 6 days but she won't let me take her I get her and about a hour later her mom comes and takes her.I sent letter to court . but havn't heard or gotten a letter from them do i wait to hear what they are going to do?  the mom  won't let me get my liitle girl. the mom  says I'm trespassing and she is going to call the police for being in her yard.
I have day care lined up for the hours I work .but I so far can't even get her to take my baby anywhere the court order says I have fisical custody. I don't want to fight infront of the baby so I don't know what to do.

[Giggles]

You say you get the child then the mother comes and gets her....don't let her.  If she threatens to call the police, let her.  If  you have a copy of your court order, the police won't do anything to you!!  If you are having trouble picking up your child, file to have the pick-up place modified to a public place (like a police station).  Then if she doesn't show, you get a police report and file for contempt.

I know all this sounds harsh, but there is a lil girl that needs her "Daddy", fight for her and fight for your relationship.  Put all emotions aside (I know it hurts), but you MUST put the best interest of the child FIRST...and it is in every child's best interest to have BOTH parents active in their lives!!!  If one parent is proventing that, then there are ways of getting that rectified!!

[MixedBag]

that's maybe why you haven't heard from the court.

When you communicate with the court, you have certain rules to follow and most of the time you have to file a motion.

You're not trespassing if you have an order that says you're supposed to pick up the child.  

The police can do a "civil standby" the next time you pick up your child, but 99% of the time, they can't enforce the order.  But that will save you from the fear of getting charged with trespassing because they will educate her and tell her that charges ain't gonna happen.

Don't let BM take the child back.  Don't answer the door when she comes and call the police to get them to remove her when she comes eaerly.

[jeffnewdad]

I don't want my baby to see  fighting between her mom and I and I feel if you have a strange policeman take her like that .the tramma would frighten  my liltle one .That would  crush me .There has to be a way to get this settled without having her scared. I love her so much and just can't have her get scared like that.
she is so little and impressionable .that would just crush me to see that happen to her.

[Giggles]

The police wouldn't be getting you daughter.  YOU would be getting your daughter with a police escort of somesort so the BM doesn't interfere.

[MixedBag]

And just to add, with a witness there, maybe the BM will behave better?