Brother needs info in Florida

[concernedAunt22]

I am new to this forum and would like to know if anyone knows of a good family law lawyer with specific knowledge of father's rights in St Petersburg, FL.  I believe my brother is being emotionally and psychologically abused by his wife.  She has him convinced that she will get full custody of the kids (one 18 months and one will be born in April) and he will have to pay her child support even though she makes more money than he does.  She has also told him that she can call the police on him and accuse him of abusing his kids and send him to jail so he will never see them again.  She knows of a case in FL now where a father was wrongly accused of abuse and has been in FL prison for 10 years with his family trying to get him out even after the mother has said she lied.  She tells him this can happen to him too so he is on pins and needles around her.  She accused him of torturing the 18 month old while trying to put eye drops in her eye for an infection because she was screaming.  She blames him for everything in her life that is going wrong.  I have been a witness to her losing her mind on him and just verbally attacking him for no reason.  He was holding his daughter while she was yelling at him and her eyes were just huge like she was really afraid.  

She has been threatening divorce for a while now, for a year that I know of, but my brother hasn't initiated it or agreed to it because he is afraid of losing his kids.  But now he is at the point that he will agree with it when it comes up next.  He says he doesn't want full custody and take the kids away from their mother, but I think she is unstable and a bad mother and wont think twice about using the kids as leverage to get what she wants.  My brother is too nice and brainwashed!  She also claims that her lawyer friend in MN has papers drawn up and will send them whenever she needs them.  This is complete BS because this friend doesn't have a license to practice in FL.  The friend might be able to give advice, but that's all.  I am not sure my brother even thinks he needs a lawyer of his own (part of the brainwashing), but I know he does.

I am trying to help my brother find a good, affordable lawyer.  Also, I am wondering if anyone knows of FL resources for men in abusive relationships.  

[HelpingHands]

He needs to file an emergency restraining order against her and ask for immediate temporary custody of the children(ex parte order ). They will ask the reasons it should be granted and he needs to list the reasons: violence,  she's threatening to remove the children from the state, emotional and physical abuse, etc.

If you could be his witness and sign an affidavit stating what you've seen re: the abuse, violence, etc. it would certainly help him.

He needs to get the upper hand while he can. She sounds like a nutjob and your brother should really be concerned with his children's saftey while in her care. Forget the 'let's be nice and not take the kids from mom' bit. If she's truly that whacked, HRS might just step in before your brother decides to. If I remember correctly, Florida mandates that family members report abuse or they can be held accountable if something happens to the children and they knew about it.

[concernedAunt22]

Thank you for posting.

I am pretty sure he won't do that now because she is 6 months pregnant.  I feel, while she is still pregnant, he needs to gather as much evidence as possible and be getting his ducks in a row.  He will need to be convinced of these suggestions; I am not even sure he would characterize himself as being abused.  That is why I am looking for a lawyer or men's organization that can talk to him and tell him what his rights are.  I don't think he will take the suggested leap just with my word alone.  She has him scared.  

She used to work for an attorneys office and thinks she knows everything there is and has convince my brother that she "knows" the law and the mother almost always wins custody, so he better not even think of taking the kids away from her.  I just recently was able to convince him to fight for 50/50 custody if it came down to a divorce.  I am so worried for him, my niece and my unborn niece!

I have never seen her hit my brother, god forbid, but I have seen her push him out of the way if he wasn't changing their daughters diaper correctly, for instance.  I am wondering if she isn't bi-polar, because she can be sweet as pie one minute and her head twisting off the next.  She refuses to see any kind of therapist...I tried to talk her into seeing a marriage counselor, but she says they don't work because she tried to see one before her first marriage fell apart.

[mistoffolees]

Waiting until you gather more evidence might be a very costly move. The longer the status quo exists, the more likely the court is to leave it unchanged.

Remember that if you file for custody today, you're going to still have some time to gather evidence.

I'm not advocating rushing to court if you can't prove anything, but time is of the essence.