consevatorship of minor child

[joehaire]

My son, now nearly age 6, was in an automobile accident in Kentucky in October 2006. His maternal grandmother was at fault, and was found to be driving under the influence of a few substances. My son's mother knew her mother's likelihood to commit such an act, based on past situations, but my son's mother chose to leave my then 4 year old son with his grandmother anyway while my son's mother got a hotel room with her boyfriend. I had recently finished college and was in California on a one year contract as an administrative consultant.

I immediately returned to Kentucky because my son was in a coma. He recovered while I was at the hospital with him. I returned to California and was able to get out of my contract and come back to Kentucky because it was obvious to me that I could not leave my son alone with his mother, for fear of another extremely bad judgment on her part.

My son is receiving a cash settlement as a result of this accident. There is a court date set in our district on April 24, 2008, as to both the Petition for Appointment of his mother as the Conservator, as well as, the Motion and Affidavit to Approve Settlement.

The letter I received from her lawyer states that if I have any objections as to the appointment of his mother as the Conservator I can voice those objections at the Hearing on that date.

I cannot afford an attorney at this present time. We have no custody set up in court, aside from the default of my son being in his mother's care through child support.

I have been doing research on all of this, but I cannot find a definitive answer to my question.

Is there any way to make both my son's mother and I as joint Conservators, with both our signatures required for any dispersion of funds?

and

Is there any way I can make it so when my son receives the money he has coming, after the maturity of the account it will be when he is age 25, and not 18, as is the wishes of his mother?

Thanks

[Kitty C.]

I think a lot of your questions could be answered by an atty., but I do have a suggestion.  I totally understand your opinion of not allowing access until your son is 25, but you might want to consider allowing for expenditures relating ONLY to college.  That way, your son wouldn't have to worry about paying for it and living expenses while he's at college.  Plus you could add that, if college expenses only were allowed, the payments would ONLY be made to either the college your son is enrolled in or living expense payments directly to your son, so that the BM won't have access to it.

While your at it, you MUST get a custody order in place.  There is a remote possibility that they won't even consider you as a co-conservator if you don't at least have joint legal custody.  I have a question for you:  How is it that the mother wasn't brought up on charges of negligence regarding the accident, since she knowingly allowed your son to ride in a vehicle with a driver who was under the influence?