"My step-daughter has three fathers!!!!!"

[anastasia]

           OK HERE IT GOES!! Please be patient because this is a long but interesting issue

I have a stepdaughter who is 11 years old now. When I met her she was 7. There was a custody battle going on when I got married, but there was something special in Stephanie (fictisious name for a true story). Each time my husband wanted to see his daughter, he has to go to court. Several times the judges told the mother that she might have to change and be a facilitator in the relationship between Stephanie and her father (my husband), but never happened.

The last summer we saw her, when we went to take the child to the airport, where her mother and stepfather were waiting for her her mother and stepfather gave us a paper. The stepfather told my husband, who he knew very well because they were good friends and next door neighbor, that with that paper my husband would resolve all his problems. The mother yelled in front of the child that she had had relations with other men and that Stephanie was not his daughter. The child began to cry hugged my husband and told her "I love you dad".

During the next two years, my husband tried unsuccsessfully to talk with his daughter, but her mother just kept telling him that she was not his daughter and that she knew it, and her real father was her stepfather which she met 10 years ago and had an affair (my husband and the stepfather were both in the military).

Finally after several months, my husband contacted his daughter and she told him that he was not her real father, and that she knew that her mother and her real father (stepfather) had a relation 10 years ago, and asked him not to call him again.

We tried desperately to maintain the case in court, because we knew there was no other way to keep in contact with the child. My husband filed for bankrupcy and we couldn't afford a lawyer anymore and mu husband decided to continue the case pro-se (by himself). But before the jurisdiction was transfered to CA, the judge in Fl told my husband to get a new lawyer and gave him three weeks. My husband explained her that he couldn't afford a lawyer anymore and begged her not to transfer the jurisdiction because he wasn't going to see his child again. The judge told him "well, you will have to get used to it" and the jurisdiction was transfered.

We received several calls from the mother offering my husband to reliquish his paternal rights using the child support as excuse. Finally we found a new lawyer in Ca and a new visitation agreement was settled.

Two days later, we knew that the mother told the child that she has three fathers:
1. BIOLOGICAL FATHER- which is the father that mammy had sexual relations with
2. LEGAL FATHER - (my husband) just for child support
3. DADDY- which is my stepfather and is with me every day.

She is visiting a psychologist and she told us that she knows that her mother shouldn't told her that and warned the mother about keep telling her about the three fathers, but she keeps telling Steph. As of today, this mother and the stepfather has broken a bond between a daughter and a father, the child doesn't want to call my husband "dad" and is not using her last name, but her stepfather's last name. This is extremly abusive for a child, but we can not find someone with enough power to tell this mother all the damage that she is causing to her own child. It seems that no body really cares about the emotional abuse that lots of children, like Stephanie are suffering.

We have to do something about that. This mother says that she loves her daughter because she has told her the truth and her blood type paper proves it (one paper from a lab that says just the blood type of the child)"that's biology 101" says the mother.

I just sent a letter to Dr. Phill's show. If you have a case like mine where the custodial parent is abusing of the right to have the child, write him. Let's make some noise. I know that if he receives lots of cases from PAS he will talk about that and we will have started to do our part.

I would like to hear from those parents that are suffering from this syndrome. The system has to work somehow. Thank God could get "back in track", but what happens with those parents who don't have the economy to sustain this type of case in court? Just get used to it?

Also, there's a thread here in the VISITATION forum called HELP CHANGE THE CURRENT LAWS read it and support this bill.

God bless you all and let's gather our voices to make the system work correctly for our kids sake.

 

[StPaulieGirl]

The mother yelled in front of the child that she had had relations with other men and that Stephanie was not his daughter. The child began to cry hugged my husband and told her "I love you dad".

[p]Oh God.

[p]My husband explained her that he couldn't afford a lawyer anymore and begged her not to transfer the jurisdiction because he wasn't going to see his child again. The judge told him "well, you will have to get used to it" and the jurisdiction was transfered.

[p]What the hell is wrong is wrong with that judge?  Quit laughing people....

[p]See my reply to your post to me on the other topic.  This is so wrong.  

[anastasia]

We just received an e-mail from our lawyer saying that she wouldn't be able to continue with the case, due to office closing. Nevertheless, she will finish with some case, but in ours seh doesn't see "any end".

Let's see what happens!

I was talking to my husband today about the home DNA, he says he has to think about that. I think he's too afraid to know the thruth. I don't blame him after beleiving that the kid was his for 10 years.....