Need Ideas for Joint Custody for School Teachers

[Ron]

I am currently seeking joint custody, 50/50 (see previous e-mail).  My (almost ex-) wife is a school teacher that has summers off, same as our 7 year old boy.  Any ideas on how we can do joint custody during the summers when our child is out of school and when she doesn't work but I do?  I don't want to put him in daycare.  She can have him during my "custody days" when I am working.  I guess we just can't do 50/50 during the summer.  I can make up, have more time with him during the school year, but I still would not want him to be more than 50% with either of us (incl me).  Any ideas?

[Kitty C.]

Yeah, she has him days and you have him evenings and nights.  I am also assuming that you would be taking time off for a vacation, and that would be continuous, consecutive time for you.  As it would be reasonable to expect the same with her.  Any possibility this could be worked out?   Or is she being a PBFH about it?

[joni]

split days and nights and then alternate weekends.  If you take a week off work during the summer to be with him, give her the same week in return when you don't see him in the evening.

Also, good for you to realize that time is better spent with mom rather than day care.

[rebecca]

When my ex was unemployed I would take my son to his place before work and pick him up from his dad's after work during my parenting time.  If I was not going to work on a particular day, I just would not take him to his dad's that day (with notice).  I did not seek to recover this time as it is time I would not have been able to spend with my son anyway.

[YahYah]

If you do the First Right of Refusal then she can automatically have him when you are working and she is not, and vice versa.  

I don't know if you are familiar with the First Right of Refusal but what it says is that if the custodial parent (at the time) can't care for the child, then the other parent will be asked if they want to care for the child.  That way the child does not go to a secondary care provider.

This way, you can still have your %50 court ordered time, and when you want to put him into camps or something, during your time in the summer, you won't have to go through the stress of begging and stuff.