Custody issues

[time with kids]

I have a problem. I am recently divorced and I have always been a part of my daughters' lives. But because of the divorce we had in Kansas, my Ex says that I am only entitled to one day aweek and every other weekend as a minimum. Who decides on if I should get more? I want to see them as much as humanly possible. but she insists that it is up to her what I get. I don't feel this is right. My attorney is soft-footed getting back to me and all I get is grief when I approach my Ex for more time. What can I do? I do not have enough money to hire another attorney and I don't believe I should be paying my ex support when she has a job and she is also recently engaged to the man she said "nothing is going on" to. He is also living with her. Is there any way I can get some advice for both these issues? Thanks.

[DeepInTheHeart]

Refer to your divorce decree. It should state in there what your parenting schedule is. Unless your attorney was an idiot and let your case go through with no parenting/visitation schedule then it is NOT up to her when you may exercise your parenting time. It should be set forth in black and white in your divorce decree.

I wish that all custodial parents could be mature enough to realize that the parenting schedules that courts set forth are intended, by the courts, to be a MINIMUM of the amount of time a child should be entitled to spend with their non-resident parent. Myself, I have not referred to the darned thing once since our divorce. He calls and says he'd like to have the kids for X weekend or period of time and we make the arrangements to make it happen. I don't look to see whose time the parenting plan says it is. He's their father and they need to have as good of a relationship with him as we can all create for them. I mean, what if I were to drop dead tomorrow? They would go live with him and if they have not spent a substantial amount of time with him and have a solid relationship with him- where does that leave them? It would almost be like them going to live with a stranger. That's NOT what I want for them.

As to support- are you referring to child support or spousal/alimony? If you are referring to child support then I can't help you. Children are entitled to support from both parents. Neither one of you created the child/ren alone and so neither of you should be required to raise the child/ren alone- financially OR physically. As for spousal/alimony my personal view is that it should be capped, time limited and limited to situations where one spouse *substantially* lacks current and immediately employable job skills due to having been out of the job market due to homemaking or recent disability rendering them unable to continue in their previous career field. It should be limited to 2 years as there are plenty of job/vocational training courses that lead to reasonable employment and earning levels that can be completed in under 2 years allowing the receiving spouse to become fully self sufficient in that time.