needing info

[wi_pa_dad]

I have 2 children, daughter 11 and son 8. Thruout the 5 years since i left their BM these kids have always stated wanting to live with me. I now reside in Wi and the children reside in Pa with BM. I travel 18 hours round trip once a month to spend 12 hours with them. This is only a temp situation as I plan on moving back to Pa in a few months. I am only granted two weekends a month for visitation. My son was molested was by the BM's BF's son a couple of years ago and I had the children in with counselors until the BM complained in court because I didnt consult her over it. The counselors report stated facts of abuse and fear of the BM. I ended up losing that case and the judge threw it out. The children speak of viewing the BF choking their BM. I arrived back from a visit this weekend totally disgusted. My 8 year old son has friends that I was aware he would sleep over at their houses with, I found out that these friends are ages 12, 14 and 15. My son shows signs of abuse such as withdrawing and the like as defined by most as abuse. I have made several attempts to have changes made in court but to no avail. The BF's children are forbidden by court order to be around my children but I found out they are left with these kids as babysitters. During my time away from the children I make calls to them but we can go weeks with no contact because their BM refuses to let them take or make calls with me. My daughter is upset because her BM told her a short time ago that if she ever died my daughter and son would have to go to a foster home because they'll never be allowed to live with me. Mind games is what she is best with and uses these games to control the children. I need help in these issues and I'm requesting the court in Pa grant me a change of venue to allow my county court in Wi to step in and I'm also attempting to get visitation changed again. Any links to sites would be greatly appreciated so I can find what I need to gain time with my children and to seek help for them. This isnt about winning, it's about making changes and being in my childrens lives, for support as well as security and peace of mind and to protect them from what has and is being done to them. Thank you all for any help you can give

[MYSONSDAD]

This is the website for Dean Tong. An expert on abuse. He usually defends parents who are falsely accused. He might be able to lead you in the right direction and what steps you should take.

What State has jurisdiction?

http://www.abuse-excuse.com/

Good luck, can not imagine the hell you are going thru. Keep us posted on what you find out...Or if you have other questions.

Are you documenting?

[wi_pa_dad]

Pa has jurisdiction and yes I document everything that happens. Kept notes and documents from the get-go. I also have photos of kids coming filthy and some with some bruises and also some taped convos with kids for lawyers to hear*(cant use tapes in court)

[MYSONSDAD]

Any chance they could go talk with a Police Officer? This way it would be documented by them. Or get them to a hospital. You need professional documentation on this. Can not believe the court would throw this out, what a bunch of A$$'s!

Take pictures of the kids, then get them developed immediately. Go somewhere like Walgreens where they date the pictures on the back.

Has DCFS or anyone else investigated this? I would think the teachers at school might be seeing things. Have you talked with them on your concerns? I would be going to the school and make a point of talking with all teachers, counselors and the principal. If they suspect something, they have to report it!

Another thought might be is a welfare check. Have the county Sheriff go out and see if there is anything going on. Let him report the abuse. But make it clear, you can be there to pick up the kids ASAP.

Can you talk to your kids? Maybe you should suggest to them to talk to the counselors at school and have the school turn her butt in.

Read that abuse sight, it will give you ideas to help prove what is going on...

I do not know how this would play out, but what about an RO on that pervert. Keep him away from those kids. Then you could have the therapist as your witness. Along with pictures. They might even listen to the tapes. I would think the children are also old enough to speak for themselves.

I have not had this come up, many here can advise you so much better. Hope it gives you some help.

[smtotwo]

//www.wisconsinfathers.org

They were a HUGE help to DH and me in our fight for placement withhis kids.

[cathy]

How very sad for your kids.

I absolutely agree with MYSONSDAD advice.

Report the abuse to the police.  The detective/investigator should interview the kids and at least have it on record.  I would hope they would also order a CME (criminal medical exam).

And do get Child Protection Services in PA involved (or whatever they are called).  I know you hear horror stories about CPS - and I'm sure some of them may be true.  But I do know that CPS was very helpful to us when the kids' stepfather was abusing them.

From what I understand, you probably will not be able to get jurisdiction changed to WI.  If there is any way you can move to PA sooner, I think that would be your best bet.

GOOD LUCK!!!