HOW CAN IT BE???

[redd1]

My fiance is currently going through a custody case.  There's been a temporary order for supervised visitation ordered with 3 phone contacts per week. This is the only time they went to court... they haven't had a custody evaluation yet or anything.  Today he spoke with his attorney and asked him to be straight with him... was it a done deal already and his attorney responded that it was and he would be lucky to get to see his daughter one time every other week.  How can that be??

Of course we are now looking for another attorney... which will be # 4... long story... had one in Illinois... am currently in Florida... how do you fight something that's already a done deal???  How can it be a done deal?   All this talk about the court wanting to do what's in the best interst of the child... he's been her primary care giver, the one who goes to school with her, on field trips, special events, takes her to school, picks her up, makes child care arrangements, takes her out to play, everything... mother has been very non-involved... how without even an evaluation can it be a done deal?  Is there any hope?  How can separating a parent from their child be in their best interest when the only reason for is is that the mother is angry and want's to punish someone?

Please tell me it's not a lost cause.  My heart breaks knowing what she's going through being without the one constant in her life.

[formykids]

Can you give us any idea why his visitation is supervised?This seems extremely harsh for no reason.

[redd1]

We lived in Florida for a year.  During that time we had Emily every other day or so and vise versa.  When we decided to move back to Illinois they discussed the situation and when we left his daughter was to go with us.  Mom begged and pleaded to have her for the summer, had trip to Disney planned, etc. He made mom promise him and the child that before school started she would bring her to live with her daddy. He decided that was only fair since we would have her the school year.

Well, needless to say the time came for her to bring the child to us and she decided she wouldn't.  Said child was her daughter now, not his... started denying him access to her.  We left his daughter with a cell phone so they could talk without affecting mom's cell phone bill.  Mother busted that up and called and told him she did, then started shutting off her phone.

Numerous attempts to work it out failed, he offered to pay for mom's visits, to help her move back up north, to help her with rent for 3 years, there was even an offer to put a down payment on a house for her if she decided to move back.  She said he was trying to buy her off, when in truth he just wanted to keep her in child's life for the child, whole heartedly believing all kids need both their parents.

When it couldn't be worked out, he hired an atty in Illinois who told him he had the right to see his child and that as long as their was no court order of custody he had the right to go to Florida and take her.  He did, called mom soon as they arrived in Chicago and told her he had her... within 3 days county sherrifs office called, informed him they could have the Illinois police arrest him, etc.  His atty failed to return calls, or speak with the county police, so we contacted an atty in Florida who told him he had to return her. which he did.  The Fl atty did nothing we asked after that.  She filed custody papers, he filed no response.  He was to negotiate on our behalf and told my fiance he should "just take the supervised visitation."  So we retained a different atty in Florida.

We subsequently moved back to Florida so his daughter could spend time with him.  He as visited her one time at her mothers for a couple of hours the day after we arrived back here.  He's seen her a couple of times at school over lunch, because mother refused to allow contact.

We live within 1/2 mile of mother.  New atty in Florida said we could have kept her, that atty in Illinois was correct in all he advised.  That he has as much a legal right to his child at this point as mother.  So, finace went over and took child out to play one day, then told her she was coming to our house for a couple of days.  He called the police and informed them he had her in his custody... had her birth certificate on him, etc.  Mother called and insisted child be returned.  Police told him he had to return her or be arrested.  Atty then tells us it goes that way with the police all the time.  (would have been nice to know ahead of time)  When asked what law he was breaking the police said "none", but that they would arrest him just the same.

The judge that heard the temporary order of protection motion told the attys he believed we had agreement with the mother, but he was furious with fiance for "taking" the child.  During hearing we presented lease papers, etc., and yet he got an order for supervised visitation and 3 phone conversations per week.  Then his atty, when asked if it was a "done deal" repsonded that it was and he would be lucky in the end if he saw her once every two weeks.

Says we can't appeal the decision as it's a non-final order... can't petition for a new judge... the atty who is handling mom's case normally works as a custody evaluator... and filed the motion ahead of our atty and of course I don't trust the firm she wants to us... they are right up the street from her.  Want to petition for evaluation firm outside out county.. preferably one that neither atty has a history with just to ensure non-bias.  

But I can't understand why this whole done deal thing.  Maybe I'm overly naive...

So now I am trying to locate an atty in jacksonville that actually has some balls and will FIGHT and do as instructed... I fail to see how ripping a loved one from a child's life is in anyones best interest.  And no one seems willing to fight for the rights of the child here...

Every day I cry over what the child is going through... she's a delightful, loving, joyous creature and her father has been the primary care giver, mother being jealous from the day she was born and believing that the child stole the love he once had for her... only decided to have an interest when he moved in with me and realized she could use the child to punish him... I can only imagine what Emily is going through and the fear she must be feeling that she may never be able to hang out with her daddy again.

I'm sorry... I'm rambling... born of frustration and outrage that a parent would choose to inflict pain and suffering on their child to their own selfish ends... and how the courts enable her to try to alienate a loving, devoted father from their childs life.

[MYSONSDAD]

If they have only gone for a Temp Order, how can it be a "done deal"

This does not sound right. I would think the attorney would have contacted you for any final orders and get your okay. And the surpervised part, is throwing me.

Post this to Socs board and follow his format.  

[redd1]

Thanks, I will... I appreciate it.