What if your attorney isn't listening to you about psychological abuse??

[tmb8076]

I am so sad for SS12.

He told MIL a couple of weeks ago that SF is mean to him.  Not just mean, but he cusses at him, and not just every now and then.

No kid deserves that.

We told our attorney.  We had depositions on Friday.  Before BM and her attorney got there, our attorney said we didn't have enough.  It was just psychological abuse.  Isn't that still abuse??? I think he is pushing us to settle.  Since we hadn't personally heard about the cussing and lashing out by SF against SS, our attorney thought it was probably just SS wanting attention from grandma!  WTF????'  He also said, that the judge probably wouldn't appoint a GAL based on what we told him.

DH and I talked to SS about it.  SS said it is BAD names he calls him. It is when his mom is home, when she isn't home, she doesn't do anything, though yesterday, she did say that she has told her husband to back off a couple of times but denies any name calling.

SS was crying when he told me.  I hugged him.  I told him it is not his fault, he is not to blame, and I am so sorry it is happening.  Poor kid.

So where can you turn when your attorney is blowing you off and not only that....he came out into the waiting room AFTER they came to an agreement on more time for DH with SS, and he shook SS's SF's hand and said, "Nice to meet you...I am a SF too."

WTH????  We told you this guy is cruel to DH's kid and you go kiss his @$$???

Do we have any recourse?  I mean, I am happy Dh is getting more time with SS, but in the meantime, he is going to have to put up with SF and his mouth and treating him this way for another 8 years?  

it just doesn't seem fair.

[Lawmoe]

Your lawyer is correct.. You do not have much.  All you have is hearsay statements from a child.  That is not something you will be able to present effectively in court without some support.  Moreover, the conduct complained of is weak. If it is only a parent vergbally disciplining a child, it will carry little weight in court particularly if the other party denies it occurred.

The issue should have been briefly explored in the deposition of the other party. However, all that you were likely to get is a denial.  

[tmb8076]

Thank you for your honesty.  I guess we will have to wait this one out.

SS is 12-1/2.  When he is 14, our attorney informs us that the judge will allow him to choose.

It is not just his SF being a disciplinarian.  He has a foul mouth and has to use "you little F---ing bastard", "what the F--- is your problem, " and "shut the F--- up".  It is hard, foul language that no child should have to put up with.

He has long watched this occur between his mom and SF...and now it is directed at him as well.  In addition, he has watched his mom punch, slap and kick his SF when she is angry.

There is also a stepbrother, (his SF's son) who has been telling his grandma the same story for YEARS. This is just how this guy operates.   But as our attorney said, it is not abuse, though it is psychological abuse.  Still not enough.

SS is too scared to come to the forefront on this right now.  We will just support him as best we can and let him know it is not right, and more importantly that it is not his fault.