Support with no set visitation schedule

[elaine60]

How do they figure support on a teenager if they are allowed to pick there own schedule for parenting time.  This is very foreign to me because up until my kids were 18 they had a set visitation schedule and I respected my ex enough to make sure that they either stuck to it or gave make up time. We were able to work around there schedule for school activities and holiday visitation time was a must.

Now things I guess are different, now teens get to make the decisions or so they say, we have yet to see. But if they do allow this how in the world can they give the noncustodial parent a credit if they do not know how many days?

[Kitty C.]

You've left a lot of information out.  Initially, it sounded like what you saying is that there is a support order, but no custody order.  But I don't think that's the case, right?  Is it because the teen has a job or school activities to go to?

As for teenagers, many judges will allow them to decide if and when they see either parent.  Because they know teens have busy schedules and friends they would rather spend time with, rather than their parents.  Besides, a judge can order specific parenting times, but if a teen steadfastly refuses to go, or has social or school activities that interfere with it, that parenting time will constantly have to be adjusted........it's called compromise and cooperation.  And if their schedule is busy enough, it will drive you batty to try to keep track of how much time the teen is or isn't with you.  Personally, I consider the time a teen spends on extra-curricular activities or a job is his or her time, not either of the parents.

Teens are only teens once.......we only have my SS (who is a freshman) every other weekend, but since he was in football this fall, that schedule went to he!! in a handbasket.  And it will probably be that way every fall until he graduates.  Once he gets a job, who knows what will happen then.  But this is the time that teens are learning how to cope in the real world and get ready for it.  I would rather my SS be allowed to participate and explore his interests constructively than force him to spend time with us if it isn't benefiting him in the same way.  Part of the reason why we actually saw him the majority of DH's time this summer is because he also agreed to mow our neighbor's yard and got paid for it.  So at least he was able to get a lesson in responsibility and managing money.  Otherwise, he may have gotten a job mowing lawns elsewhere.