Missing children Ramsey county Minnesota

[RamsyCoMN]

1. 2 children 2&3 years, wife wants a divorce and a new husband that makes more $$.

2. I move out under threats that she will call police and claim abuse.

3. she gets a restaining order when I want to come back for clothes, claims I called her a name-order granted.

4. claims I secretely make cash on the side. Judge orders more than 100% of my income as support.

5. she claims I am in a cult, alcoholic, drug user, abusive ect. I pass all extensive tests and embarrassment.

6. she calls police and claims I kidnapped the kids, I drop the off at the police dept as ordered by police.

7. family services put me through hell over it. and gives her a letter saying that the kids are damaged by it.

8. she tell me she will claim that I am sexually abusing my 3 year old daughter, I decide to stay away for a while.

9. She dissapears with kids.

10. Ramsey county will not disclose where abouts claiming privacy but still enforces child support.

11. 13 years go by I cannot find her (I have very limited income and resources and no help from Ramsey Co.)

12. Google search finally finds her, I track her down through a latter EX husb, when I call I get threats and F....Y...

13. she moved to Washington then Colorado, Changed her and the kids middle and last names to hide.

14. Ramsey County still doesent care but they send me a letter saying they will take my drivers lic if I don't pay the $3.00 I am past due WOW!! (dont worry I paid)

15. Kids are now 17 and 18 and think I am a down and out drug addict that doesn't care about them.

16. Wondering if there is any help out there??? Ramsey county Minnesota

Thanks for reading
A-

[Kitty C.]

Not quite sure what you're asking for here, especially considering the kids are adults, or about to be.

But if you're looking at trying to contact your kids, just keep at it.  Always remember that your kids have been brainwashed all their lives about you.  Even if you find them, they will look at you as the devil incarnate.  I would recommend getting any literature on PAS (Parental Alienation Syndrome, which is what was done to them), how it affects the child, and how to overcome it.

Kids will believe what is told them over and over and for so many years. If you find them, they will call you every name in the book and could possibly tell you to your face that they wish you were dead.  DO NOT BLAME THEM!  Because they know no different.  All you can to is be patient and persistent and pray that eventually they will see that you are not the evil man their mother made you out to be.  Use the Web to see if you can find them.  If and when you do, try contacting them by phone.  If that's not possible, then write letters...you will probably get them returned to you, but if you want to contact them, you will have to keep at it.  If they still claim you're a drug addict, get tested and send them the results.  If they dispute it, offer them the opportunity to do it themselves and you will still pay to have it repeated.  Understand that there may be MANY hoops you will have to jump through to convince them.  You're working against a lifetime of PAS.......it won't get better overnight...in fact, it might take years, if ever.  In other words, PROVE them wrong and allow them to see that.  But you won't know until you try and even if you fail, at least you gave it your all.

If you ever want to contact them and even attempt to have a relationship with them, the key will patience and persistance.  And always remember that any venom they spew at you is only the words that were fed to them by their mother.....it would be very easy to get royally pi$$ed when your child calls you a m......f......., but they know no different, regardless of how old they are. 

I have a dear friend who's ex did this to their child.  He is now a grandfather and may never see his grandchild, because he can't get past how vicious and uncaring his daughter is to him.  I've tried to tell him that she knows no different...only what she was told by her mother, but he still thinks that, since she's an adult, she should know better.  She doesn't even know him!  Once he understands that, he might have a chance if he can be patient and persistant.