Need some advice

[Indy01]

I need some advice. I have 3 children from a previous marriage, and I am having a lot of visitation issues with my 14 year old daughter. She Say's that she does not want to come over any more because of my current wife. We are suppose to go through mediation, which we did and the mediator said that she has to come over once a week to spend time with me, but my daughter always seems to find a reason to not make it. My x-wife stated it is up to my daughter if she wants to come or not. Is this not the wrong thing? I don't know how my x-wife cannot produce my daughter to me. Our other 2 children are 12 year old twins, and not she has one of them reporting to her about what happens here. I approached my son about it, but he just lied to me when I overheard what he was talking about.

I ve been doing some research, and it seen like she is doing Parental Alienation Syndrome to me and my children.

Please let me know what I should do. By the way I am from Minnesota.

Thanks,

[Kitty C.]

This may not meet the criteria of PAS, but what your ex is doing with your daughter is certainly against the CO.  It is NOT up to your daughter as to whether she wants to come see you or not.  She has to whether she likes it or not.  It's no different than if you were to tell her she has to be home at a certain time.........she may not like it, but she has to do what she's told. 

As for your ex, what she is doing by allowing your daughter to make up her own mind whether she wants to see you or not is contempt of the custody order.  If you have been through mediation and the mediator even said the same thing, she is definitely in contempt.  So it sounds like the only avenue you have left to force your ex to comply is to file a petition of contempt of court, for her refusal to provide your daughter to you for court-ordered parenting time.

And with what you described with your son, there are various ways you can approach this.  Sitting him down and telling him what you know he is doing might put him in the hot seat to spill the beans to you.  And this is another issue that can either be brought up in mediation or in the court.  If you have an atty., it wouldn't hurt to contact them and get their opinion of what direction they think you should go with this.