Anyone with a substantiated CPS case against opponent?

[slkslk]

Hi there -

We are beginning a custody evaluation after a three year, multiple case experience with the Department of Social Services.  At the end, my daughter's father had two separate cases substantiated against him.  One was for our daughter (sexual abuse and injurious environment) and one for his stepson at the time (neglect and injurious environment.)

Ex has police reports stating serious domestic violence towards previous wife (after me) and stepson, with no convictions.  Ex has documented long history of mental illness including two inpatient stays (depression with psychotic features, Anxiety Disorder NOS, possible Borderline Personality Disorder.)  Ex was violent when I was married to him as well.

I have crimal history of 2 DUIs 12 years ago.  Ex also claims that I was sexually promiscious as a teen/college age, etc. etc.  I have had our 2nd grader daughter as her primary caregiver since her birth.  Ex has had supervised visitation ONLY from our separation, though he did receive joint custody shortly before the second CPS case was opened.

Ex claims that I coached daughter for SA claims and may be asking for full custody.  I did not.  Ex is also suing CPS in federal court for "violating his civil rights."  They did not see each other for 19 months.  Daughter is currently in therapy, doing well and understands that soon there will be people helping us to figure out how she can see her Dad the best way.  She is seeing him currently with short, regular, supervised visits (due to MY initiative to reinstitute some regular visitation) but the "terms" of visitation have not been complied with by him.  Ex is currently divorced again, but just bought a huge house in a cool neighborhood (with a 110 ft. waterslide pool!)  I am very happily married, with another child from husband, currently PTA president and very involved in community.  I'm gainfully employed parttime as a nurse and have a very stable, happy home.

Has anyone been in a custody dispute where an exhaustive CPS report was filed?  How likely is it that the custody evaluator and later judge will agree with CPS conclusions?

Also - how do I point out his long history of violence and unpredictability without sounding like I am slamming him?  I actually DO want my daughter to have a positive relationship with him (she loves him very much) but I don't feel like he is stable in any way.  Should I simply allow custody evaluator to find these things out on her own?  Or wait until she asks directly?  Or would I then sound like I'm not really concerned for daughter's safety?

I'm starting to really psych myself out here and am just looking for some objective feedback or thoughts on this.

Thanks,

SLKSLK

[mistoffolees]

These are questions that you'd be better off asking your attorney or Socrateaser.

If I couldn't get input from a legal expert, I'd be inclined to have all the written documentation handy and just give it to the custody evaluator 'for his records" but not to talk very much about the issues. If you talk about the issues, there's a chance you'll sound like you're slamming hiim. If you simply provide documentation, you're giving the CE what he needs to make a decision.

[slkslk]

Thank you for your reply!

I have a good rapport with my attorney... he doesn't sugar coat and he's very blunt.  I'm just getting nervous, I think, as we head into this chapter of the saga and mostly just wanted to vent and look for any similar experiences....

Thanks again!

SLK