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pa paper. what now

Started by fathersquest, Jan 03, 2007, 10:39:25 PM

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fathersquest

father in need. found out i signed a pa  when child born. mother doesnt remember. she took kid to fl. for a month to visit her family.what can i do now. dont we have equal rights?she always takes off and leaves child with me while she gets her thoughts together. this makes the 10th time . tired. time for stability. i have my own home and job. she has nothing and is a stripper.if she creates residence for him in fl. can i still file for cus in ga.?

mistoffolees

You need to get legal asistance. NOW. If you can't afford it, ask Socrateaser:
http://deltabravo.net/dc/dcboard.php?az=show_topics&forum=106

Many of the issues are time dependent. Once the child has been a Florida resident for a certain time, your ability to control the situation drops. You'd need to  do some research to find out what Florida law says about the time limit and what constitutes residence. For example, if she keeps coming back to your house in between visits to FL, that might be different than if she went to FL to stay. A lawyer can tell you.

Don't delay. Act now.

Ref

and Sd will be paying for the rest of her life.

DH's ex moved to Florida temporarily to get her head together then never came back and filed for divorce there. He sees his child rarely and child has been raised in terrible conditions because BM isn't fond of working.

What does your PA say? Is is filed with the court? Were you married? How long have they been there? Is the child enrolled in school?

If they have been in Fl for less than 6 months, look for an attorney in your state that specializes in Family law and preferably in Fathers' rights. Have him/her file emergency order of custody to be granted to you and have them file to keep the child in state.

If they have lived in Fl for over 6 months, get an attorney there. Same credentials as above. You will likely have to deal with the florida courts for some time now and it is unlikely, but not impossible to get custody.

Misto is right. Do it now! Get an attorney before the window closes. Florida is not a state you want to deal with.

Ref

fathersquest

she has probation and suspendid liscence in ga 8 mo. left. only been in fl for 3 weeks.says coming back to live in ga.???!!shouldnt be a valid legit move to fl without prob knowing..paternity ack says im father and shes mother signed by both. filed with ga vital records.she has no clue this exists.child is 3. no school .never married..money tight for lawyer,new house.so lawyer situation is iffy right now.but i know is crit. thanks to all for advice.

mistoffolees

It's going to be very hard doing this on your own without an attorney, but at least see the Socrateaser board for advice before going it alone.

And you might find that you get better results if you work on your grammar and punctuatoin. Like it or not, if your post is unreadable or nearly so, it's hard to be taken seriously.

Good luck.

Ref

When I read your post I feel like I am talking to someone about to walk in the same footprints as my DH. BM moved to Fl temporarily (13 years ago). BM didn't like to work. Lived in Section 8. Had no family near her. Drank too much. Did drugs.

DH lost the window of opportuntity for a few reasons. 1. He believed she would be back. 2. He never imagined how uninvolved BM would make him. 3. He was living with his mom and had no car and a job that paid next to min. wage.

For 9 years he only saw Sd for a week in the summer, a week in the winter and her birthday weekend. He was no longer a dad and Bm liked it that way. Over 9 years BM was practically the only influence on Sd. Sd has learned how to steal, do drug, drink, lie A LOT, be as lazy as possible. She has no concept of family because Bm moved away from all of Dh's and disowned all of hers. SD is going to have a tough adulthood because of this. BM is so consumed with being the only one in Sd's life, she told Sd that when she goes to college that she will move to where she is.

Anyway. LISTEN! Your new house is nothing compared to making sure your child is not raised by someone like your ex. Seriously, sell your home, rent a room out, borrow on the equity, borrow from your 401k, borrow from family, get credit cards and max them out. You will get the money back. Your child will not get their childhood back.

Think about it this way. DH pays $6,000 a year (not including my airfare when I go with him), he pays long distance calls, he will more than likely have to pay for therapy for SD, he has paid almost $10,000 and got off cheap for all of the court crap.

You have an excellent chance to get custody, if you go for it now. Your chances drop to almost 0 if you let it go on longer. You are setting a precident right now. Judges like to keep the status quo. If the child is living with the mom more, they may not want to change that. If the child is in Florida for any period of time, they might not want to change that. That is why you have to work on it now. Get a free consultation. Find a way to scrape up $2k or so for a retainer and don't even think about how much debt you will be in. It is worth not losing your child.

Sorry if I sound harsh, but I see you haveing so much more opportunity then my DH. Knowing the pain of losing his daughter, I don't think you would want that. It really is like the death of a child, but the pain is reopened each time you pack them up to fly back to BM knowing it will be 6 months before you get to be with them again.

Ref