enforcement hearing soon

[John-J-Jay]

Dear Posters,

as you know from my previous postings I'm the CP for 8 years strong now, our child is almost 10. I've petitioned the court to order my ex-wife to pay child support which I haven't rec'd in 4 yrs and to move to standard visitation. She's now starting to play hard ball. She's filed a motion to enforce against me for false aligations. The prior order that was entered with the court said that I was suppose to take our child to counseling and should continue to send our child to counseling but may lessen with the recommendation of the counselors.

1. I took our child for the last 3 yrs to counseling since the prior order was entered into and each counselor has wrote a letter stating our child has completed the course and doesn't have any emotional or behavioral problems. thus after the 3rd counselor I stopped taking our child to counseling and the ex is trying to get me in contempt on this issue. However why does she need to go if each one says she's ok? each counselor has stated she doesn't have any problems.  she says I'm not taking care of our childs emotional health by not taking her. which is wrong and not true. How will this play a role since she might fight for custody.

2. we both agreed to put a certain amount of $$ way per year into a college savings account, I have mine in a regular account with my childs name and she has her's in a college investment account 529. she says I have the $ in the wrong place and is trying to say I'm in contempt for not having it in a 529 account instead of a regular savings account, the $ is there but not where she wants it. total of $3,000

is this a stall on her behalf to prevent the child support from being heard?

she put in her motion she wants me to be placed in prison for 18 years based on the two above aligations.

Does anyone see any potential problems on my behalf, I have a enforcement hearing coming up on this issue soon, yet the child support issue that I filed for seems like it will never be heard by the courts.  

this is crazy.

[notnew]

John,

You are worrying in vain again.

1. Counseling. You adhered to the order. 3 counselors provided documentation stating the child did not need counseling. Done deal. Your attorney may want to bring the counselors in to testify to this fact or depose them. If you are stating the truth, then there is nothing to worry about.

2. Unless your CO says the money has to go into a 529 plan or specifies otherwise, you are not violating anything.

3. Her filings are meant to scare you and further to get you to possibly drop your CS filing and perhaps "settle" and give her partial or full custody. Is it working?  Don't let it faze you. Your attorney knows what is going on. What has the attorney said to you about this?

4. The 18 years in jail is a bunch of crap. Pay it no attention whatsoever. Again, hasn't your attorney said this also?

5. I think if you present your evidence,  you should have nothing to worry about.

6. What is delaying your CS hearing? Is your attorney working out a settlement with her attorney to try to get it worked out without a court hearing?

John, I think you are worrying too much. So much of this stuff is just meant to terrorize the opposition. Don't let it and you take that control away from her.

[John-J-Jay]

Thanks for the quick reply, my atty says it's a pissing match. That I have 3 counselors to back me, regarding the $$ that i have in a regular savings account which is $3000, i'm regulated becuase of my position in dealing with stocks, bonds and mutual funds that i couldn't open up a 529 account. I'm regulated by the Security and exchange commission because of the type of work i do, so i couldn't open a 529 account. I've sent documentation to my atty regarding this and our company's policy and ethics (insider trading info) which prohibited me to open one up until Nov 16, 2006. since then i've opened up a 529 account and have funded it with over $3000.

The delay in getting the CS hearing done is the fact her atty goes before the court to get it postponed each time it is set. Then we have it set and they file discovery, then they file a motion to enforce. etc .....

[notnew]

Hasn't the court set a date that discovery must be completed by in the case? There is a filing that your attorney can file regarding excessive discovery requests that are an undue hardship and only meant to delay the process. I am not sure of the exact legal wording, etc.

I also believe your attorney can file a request to hear the matter and allow no additional postponments. The money she is spending in attorney fees could be better used in CS.

It seems you are on solid ground and I would not worry about. I would however, ask your attorney to get the ball moving on sanctions against the opposing side for failure to move the case forward, etc., and whatever has to be done to get the case settled asap. There are resolutions for this type of behavior. I'd also ask your attorney if the opposing counsel's actions could be subject to reprimand by the attorney grievance commission in your state.

They just love dragging this mess out don't they?

[notnew]

BTW - There is a loophole in discovery law that is federal mandate. You can reply to their discovery requests stating that the requested items are available for review at the attorney's office and copies can be made of same all at their cost by appointment only.

I've had this done to me and I've also used it. Your attorney may not want to go this way, but it's always an idea. Letting them know you are up to their game and can make it equally as difficult for them may be a driving force to lead them to the settlement table.

Has your attorney offered any CS amount settlements? Has your ex provided any financial information so that CS calculations can be worked up even?  

[John-J-Jay]

they are requesting basically everything that i've done in the last 8 yrs, phone records, checking account info, credit report, my paycheck stubs for the last 8 yrs, w2's, tax info, all credit card statements for the last 8 yrs, i can go on and on. We currently have a motion before the court to limit what they are asking for. Because we have filed our response saying it's too burdenson etc but they still want everything.

it's sorta of like my life doesn't have any privacy to it what so ever.

[John-J-Jay]

she refuses to agree to child support because she claims it fattens my pocket, yet i'm paycheck to pay check like most of us are. i have some savings but not a whole lot.

[notnew]

Well, you'll just have to wait to see what the court decides on the scope of discovery. Your attorney can also turn the table and request like records for your ex.

I have never heard of such requests for a CS order to be put in place. At most, you would need to provide and SHE would too 3 years of W-2's and last two pay stubs.

As I said, I think she is trying to scare you into a settlement that is in her favor. I'd press on. You are making it without her money so her dragging it out won't hurt that.

I would though file a request that she be ordered to pay your attorney fees beyond XXX date due to her failure to settle the case in a timely manner. That can have the same effect on her that she is trying to have on you!

Also, if you need and want to, you can do a little bit of your own snooping around to see details on her home ownership, etc. There is a lot of information available on the net. A little information can go a long way to getting things settled out sometimes.

Just stick to your guns and don't worry about all the smoke and mirrors being displayed. It's just trickery.

[John-J-Jay]

what kind of details are you referring to regarding homeonwership? how would i find out information?

[notnew]

Some states have real estate databases that can be accessed on-line. You search by county and street address. It will show who the present owner is. If they occupy the home or not (like if they rent it out they wouldnt' live there) and all records of the deed transfers. These databases are usually maintained by the state assessment office.

All deed information is public knowledge and can be accessed in the county deed office and copies can be obtained for a small fee. Any refinances would not show up on the assessment database, because the ownership didn't change, but a deed of trust would be filed which gives quite a bit of information as it is a copy of the mortgate agreement. You can go into these deed offices and do a search of the address to find if any recent activity has taken place. Deed research is done all the time by title companies, etc.

Some states have civil and criminal court case databases that can be searched also. Different states have different information available. You have to find out what you can access in your state.

It was just an idea to help you to get some information if possible. There may be nothing of interest or value for you in looking, but if she is hiding things, it may be a way of uncovering things. Like I said, if you find out something of interest and the attorneys discuss the matter, she may be inclined to get things over with.

Some of what you may find could be used as evidence and some may not. I am no expert in this area, just snoop around on the net that's all. You may not even get anything that is solid, but provides a direction to steer you or your case in. Or, you may find nothing. It's all a gamble.