father needing info

[yate12]

I am dad and I have custody.  My kids and I reside in the state of texas.  Both mom and I began standard visitation via 2009 divorce decree with children.  Certain situations came up in regards to mom's husband and moms past, that allowed me to get a temp. rest order on her, however at that time, child support caught up with her and was going to be putting her in jail if she didn't pay $xxxx by X date because she is $1X,XXX.xx in arrears. With all that being given to her, that day she decided to petition a request for voluntary term of rights.  After the granted petition, she signed the sworn affidavit.  Her conditions were that my wife was to adopt them and she was going to be.  So it was a Term. to Adopt case.  My wife did all that was required of her, passed background check, home study was waved due to my wife being their step mom / living and raising them for over 5 years. This process took several months and a few weeks before the final signatures were put into play by all parties and judge, the case was suddenly dropped.  The Attorney General came back into the picture, she was given (from what I am told by my lawyer and case records online) is only active standing order, an order suspending commitment.  There is nothing in there that specifies visitation, times, holidays and so forth as we did before.  Records indicated original divorce decree has been disposed and being there are many terms the state of Texas, well definitions used for the term "disposed", throw me off.  From what I was told by a paralegal at the court house was because mom was found in contempt and the circumstances that arose, as I mentioned above, caused dismissal of the cause # and all cases associated with it except for the final order (order suspending commitment.)

I suppose what my question here, because mom is loosing her marbles.  She wants to see the kids and so forth and because of all the sufficient evidence I had on what allowed me to the TRO, things she has told me over messages that her husband is trying to kill her and so forth ... what am I to do.  Honestly, until I can get down to the court house were I live in texas, 100 miles apart from mom, I can't just send them without knowing if their marriage is really ok.  The kids have spent months thinking she didn't want them anymore (no i did not tell them that).  I've told her I want to be able to work with her as far as visitation, but for the emotional sake of the kids, especially one of them having a emotional disability, to take things small and simple. One step at a time.  Start with supervised visits, move on from there, sit with a mediator, see what they recommend.  But she refuses to listen to any (i think) reasonable suggestions that I have. Just that, "well I am going to come down there regardless and you can't rob me of my parental rights and they are mind too and so on and so on." Yes she is right but as a father it is also my duty to protect the children as well if I feel that they are in harm.  I don't want to make assumptions or pry into her marriage either ....

Just a very worried father.  I want to know does she have visitation or not.  If it's not in the orders and there are no signed papers by a judge in both of our hands stating she has visitation then she has none. That's all I want to know.  So if she does, I can look into my rights as an emergency plan, if not, where do I go from here to ensure their safety temp, without taking away her rights as a mother.

[ocean]

Disposed just means that case is finished. My divorce says disposed. Done....but can be opened up again through motions.

You really need to find out what you have as far as legal custody and what she has legally as of right now.

From what you wrote is sounds like mom had visitation until all the crap happened then she was going to sign her rights away....however....that did not happen ...so does it go back to what you had before? In the meantime, there were orders under the restraining order but I am assuming that is done and over too....which means...does it go back to the first visitation plan you guys had.

Since you had kids all this time and she lives so far away, time to get your ducks in order. Save all recordings or texts with mom saying she is going to come and get the kids. You may be able to get another restraining order stating mom can not take kids until a hearing/therapy with kids/ whatever.

You prob need a lawyer in your area to get case changed to near you and to see what exactly you have. If mom is no longer giving up her rights, see what the status of the child support paperwork is and have them start to collect.

Good luck!

[yate12]

Yes Ocean I am already on that.  Apart of that I suppose is me looking for more answers, if you catch my drift.  She is a nightmare and I don't know if any attorney would even want to take her on because of what she did to my last one which I no longer have him to represent me in order for him to save his law degree, and no i don't mean anything in a inappropriate manner.  That's just how devious and dangerous she can be.  It's why i have custody of the kids.  she was in jail at the time of the hearing and I didn't set it that way either.  She's already been to jail for support, which is why the final orders suspending commitment basically are like a divorce decree, but without stating the possession order aspect of it, if you get what I am saying.  And I have heard and read from different questions asked by other people, attorney responses saying that if both parties (mom and dad) do not have a judge signed copy in their hands that state visitation / possession standards then she has non at all.  My lawyer, right after the case dropped stated that both my wife and I can choose where or when mom can see the kids.  And that's what I tried to do from the get go was establish some sort of supervised visits, maybe counseling, ect ... my wife is very good in the family law area as she is studying to become a paralegal and family law is her main focus but even this has her stumped.  All she could explain to me was that there are several definitions to the term "disposed" used by the court.  It you have one cause # with multiple cases on it, it could of been dropped due to just major case over load or contempt.  Many reasons.

Thanks for your input ocean.