Ex-wife taking me back to court for primary custody

[joeyqz]

Not sure if anyone can help with my Las Vegas situation.  Basically, my 24-year-old ex-wife is taking me back to court to modify the custody, specifically seeking temporary physical custody of our 3 year old girl.  As it stands right now, we both have 50/50, joint legal and physical, no child support, child alternates weeks between the both of us.  Divorce was finalized June 2007, so less than a year has lapsed.

Her attorney's basis for seeking a modification/change rests on text messages and email correspondence between my ex and myself, both denigrating each other, etc.  Her attorney is trying to build a case such that the text/email PORTRAYS me as some kind of "unfit" individual who needs to be psychologically evaluated, can't let go of the divorce, or has an extreme character flaw that if WORSENS, could jeopardize our child in a negative way, and so physical custody should be awarded to her.  A lot of allegations that I'm suicidal, abusive, etc. supported merely with text/email as evidence.

This line of action stems from a restraining order I had issued upon her for threatening behavior towards myself, daughter, and mother.  Her 55-year-old-doctor-boyfriend was also party to the threats, wanting to "kill me" for arguing with his "girlfriend".  I had my daughter for approxiamtely 2.5 weeks during the TPO phase.

Anyhow, the TPO was dissolved and I'm supposed to report back in Feb. to address the custody issue and any attorney's fees the ex had to pay to defend herself.  In my opinion, there is no concrete evidence against me: no CPS reports; no police reports, not even a police report attesting to my suicidal intentions; no domestic violence reports, nada, nothing.  The only thing against her was the TPO.

I work as a registered nurse, 2 full-time night jobs.  I don't drink, smoke, or gamble.  I have provided full-time insurance for our daughter since she was born.  The ex, on the other hand, makes twice my salary and bought the "cheapest" insurance to cover herself only.  Her insurance doesn't even cover the pediatrician's well-check visits.  She relies on my insurance.  The ex has never shared in the medical care of our daughter.  I have all the receipts and documentation.  I took the night positions to make myself more available to my daughter during the daytime.

I managed to retain the same attorney who handled the divorce and I am working hard to save for legal fees this coming battle.

My question:  Would the court likely find my ex in favor of primary physical custody BASED on text/email that paints my character as somebody psychologically unfit?  Her attorney has carefully crafted a series of events that may mislead anyone into thinking I'm a lunatic.  There is no abuse report of any kind, no CPS investigation, no domestic charges.  I would certainly submit to any kind of testing to ascertain my parenting abilities.

I neglected to mention that in my ex's motion, she blatantly states that I am not the biological father, and that at the time she and I were dating, I knew of other men in her life.  I was so upset to hear that.  Why would she wait 4 years to tell me that I'm not the father?  Basically then, I was "tricked" into caring for her during the pregnancy, paying for all the bills?

On my own volition, I paid $400 for a notarized paternity test that certifies me as the biological father.  Doesn't that by virtue make my ex suspect to being "psychologically unstable"? To vehemntly deny me as the father just to support her claims for primary custody?  She doesn't know that I had the paternity test done.  I am waiting to convey that info during court.

I just want to know what I'm facing or the chances of retaining 50/50 custody.

[docbilly]

My experience and I have much is that the person that throws unsubstantiated or nitpicky stones ends up loosing custody. The person who goes into court calmly and without anger or accusation fairs the best. If one constantly expresses the motive of the child's best interest then one wins. Don;t attack your ex in court. Calmly defend yourself while attempting not to paint the ex as a villain. This makes you look good. Let her own words show how vindictive she is. Judges do not judge testimony, they judge demeanor. The assumption is that all are lying but expressions and gestures are what they read.
Bill

[joeyqz]

Thank you for responding.  I feel a little bit more confident now.  At least I can be comfortable knowing that my sanity and logic are in check. I was very worried about her attorney's motion and all the allegations in the document.

I appreciate any more insight should you feel inclined to do so.

Joseph

[ocean]

Stop texting her and just ignore her. If she has a question in her rant, answer her question directly and with as few words as possible. Do not feed into it. If it is bad enough again, go get another restraining order and do not let it get dropped.

[joeyqz]

Thnx for your input. In hindsight, I will certainly be more aggressive. I am so tired of having to battle her every other week, just to be a father to my child...

[determined]

If there is information that your ex is not aware of which you may wish to use, do not share openly on the internet like this.  Anybody can read these posts, and even if she doesn't recognize the details, it might start her thought process.

I hate sounding paranoid, but Family Courts teach paranoia.

[joeyqz]

Ur probably right, but my ex isn't that savy enough to search the internet on her own and search the message boards.  I just needed to hear some others' thoughts on my situation.