Being accused of molestation???

[itsalluphillfromhere]

So I'm on vacation with my 3 boys.  My ex-face timed my 8-year-old and saw that his cousin was tickling him.  She texted all three of my boys and told them their uncle should not be tickling them.  My eldest texted her back and let her know it was a joke and that it was his cousin not his uncle.  Fast forward to this morning all three boys get a long text about how tickling is inappropriate and that their uncle should not be tickling them.  My 8-year-old texts her back and says he was not tickled by his uncle.  she texts him and tells him to stop lying his father plus a bunch of stuff how she can't protect him because he is not with her

Meanwhile, I e-mail her and tell he no such thing happened.  she sends me a long string about how I am enabling molestation by ignoring it etc. etc.  I send back I will not entertain her false accusations and she needs to stop doing this to our children.

My concern is she is going to try to involve child services.  I have copies of all the texts and my boys know it's b.s.
At this point, I feel that she has gone too far by texting our children that I am lying to them and details on her concerns about them being molested.

I have a call with an attorney tomorrow to see what my options are.  Wondering if it's necessary.

 

[MixedBag]

Such a sad word we all live in.....when tickling is turned around like that.

Print, file, screen shot, and move on.  Enjoy your vacation and limit your communication with the real abuser which is the other side for taking something simple and fun and trying to turn it into something ugly.

[ocean]

I agree.....and do not have any more conversations about it. Keep it simple and precise "kids were playing with the cousin, nothing happened , please stop these accusations". Then ignore. If she keeps it up, talk to the lawyer about harassment charges and maybe how to limit mom's contact while with you like by her only contacting them on certain days. Also NO facetimeing, so she cant see what is going on since she flips things around. Phone calls or texts. Before kids go home, screen shot their phones too so you have that conversation.

Look up phone call laws in your state. Some states you need to tell the other person they will be taped. Text her that all future phone calls may be taped from now on. Even if it is audio taped you can still hear her non-sense.

Sounds like thankfully your kids are older and see her true colors. If you think they need therapy go interview a few people and take them on your time. Many therapists are not good so interview first. It can be family therapy with a few minutes for each of them by themselves. Also will help you and get some ideas on how to handle ex. Remember anything you say, text, email she has copy of too so limit it all and mostly ignore or one sentence business type reply. "never happened, kids having a great vacation, they will call you later". ignore....

[ocean]

I just re-read, does the 8 year old have his own phone? Limit time he has phone in his hands...say "im going to hold phone for the day, we are on vacation, lets go have some fun....(in the pool)" He will forget about it and mom wont be interrupting ....then at night say, why dont you send a quick text to mom before bed....if mom face times, make sure no one else is in room except you and another adult or older child so nothing else can be said.
Enjoy the time with kids...she wants to get to you and ruin your fun! Take lots of pictures for memories...and proof.

[MixedBag]

ditto to all that.

[itsalluphillfromhere]

Thanks for the advice.  FYI - 8 year old has an IPOD with Facetime when he is connected to the internet

[MixedBag]

When he's connected -- remember your time, you rules, YOUR time to parent.