We need advise!!

[akaland]

My husband and I live in CA and his 13 1/2 year old daughter lives in Ohio.   He and his Ex have been divorced for about 11 years.  Every year when it gets to be time for his daughter to come out the Ex complains and harrasses us about flight times, dates, and even threatens not to put her on the plane.  This year it went to a new low.   His ex had her new husband call to ask if his daughter could take a trip with a friend of hers - to Disney World.  They would be leaving when school got out and would be gone for about 2 weeks.   He also offered my husband "more time" with his daughter since this would interfer with his visitation.  When my husband called to discuss dates so we could change his daughters ticket, he was told that he can not have any more time  with her, that he has his eight weeks and that's all he is entitled to.  He told his ex that he would not change the ticket and he was taking his 10 weeks.   Now they refuse to let him speak to his daughter, when he calls, they hang up on him or tell him she is not there.  He has tried to speak to her for four days.   We need help with this situation.  There is no speaking with his ex, it's her way or no way, there is no compromise.   Any suggestions????????????????

[Kitty C.]

Yeah, tell her that SHE can pay the penalties for having to change the ticket.  Just kidding........

If you really want to get in touch with your SD, do it thru her school, if you have contact with them.  If you haven't, try on line.....most schools have their own websites and post email addys for their staff.  That's how I keep in contact with DS's and SS's teacher and it's SO much easier than trying to call and their being in class.

One thing for certain...REFUSE to talk to the new hubby about this, as he has no say-so in it.  It should ONLY be the bio-parents who coordinate this.  But let me offer this:  do you think she would be agreeable if you went back to the 8 week thing?  If so, then I suggest you try that.  Then AFTER SD goes back at the end of summer, file contempt on the BM for refusing to follow the CO in regards to allowing him to use all the time together if he wished.  I think, as nasty as the BM is being, compromise is the only way you are even going to get to see your SD, and you'd also be out the airfare, too.  Then haul her a$$ back to court and prove to her she can't have HER way all the time.

[Sunshine1]

I would tell her that the eight weeks is fine to shut her up (verbally, not in a letter).  They had already agreed to you having her 10 didn't they and then they changed their mind?  I would get her out there and then say whoops, I thought we agreed to 10 weeks, well I can't change the tickets, unless you would like to pay for the change.

Either way once you get her there the court order says you can take it all at once so do it.  Just the sneaky way of doing it.  Just my opinion.

Good Luck!! :)