RELINGUISHING RIGHTS B/C NOT CONSENTED PREGNANCY

[pearlsofpae]

Please help me. My girlfriend got pregnant intentionally behind my back. She said she was on birth control, but was lying. I do not want anything to do with this child. I want to give up my parental rights and have nothing to do with this child. How do I do this? And if I do, do I have to pay child support? I live in PA and need help. This woman is psycho! She already has two kids to two different dads, looking to find someone to take care of her. Please reply, IM or email me with any information you might have...Thank you so much

[Rakkasan]

[EM]My girlfriend got pregnant intentionally behind my back.[/EM]

First of all cenception rarely takes place behind your back. Wrong position all together I tried it and it doesn't work.

[EM]She said she was on birth control, but was lying.[/EM]

DUH!!!!!!  No offense to the ladies on this site, but this is not at all uncommon which is why you should abstain from sex or take precautions of your own.

[em][font color=red]In the interest of equal time and fairness the male equivalent of this is the women who is starts dating a guy who is unemployed when she meets him and then after he moves into her house the women complains that he lays around and won't work.[/font]

[EM]This woman is psycho! She already has two kids to two different dads, looking to find someone to take care of her.[/EM]

And you found this somehow an attractive enough trait to get nekkid and bump uglies with her???

My advice.... stop picking up women in bars at closing time.

You made this bed, now you get to lay in it.

Who knows maybe you will get along swell with the other two dads.

[Brent]

>I do not want anything to do with this child.

Too late, you're the dad. You might get a patermity test just to make sure, but even that may not make a difference.


>I want to give up my parental rights and have nothing
>to do with this child.

You can't do that. It doesn't work that way.


>How do I do this?

See above. You can't just "give up your rights" to the child. I'm telling you, it doesn't work that way.


>And if I do, do I have to pay child support?

You will likely have to pay support no matter what. Even if you somehow succeeded in giving up your parental rights, you'd still probably have to pay child support.


>I live in PA and need help.

What you need is a reality check.


>This woman is psycho!

Lol, aren't they all? ;) Seriously though, this makes no difference.



>She already has two kids to two different dads, looking to find
>someone to take care of her.

And it looks like you were the lucky winner, unfortunately.



>Please reply, IM or email me with
>any information you might have...Thank you so much

Nothing to tell. Get an attorney as quickly as you can. You're going to need one.

(In case you're wondering why no one here is sympathetic to your plight, understand that most of the men here are fighting tooth and nail just to see their kids....while you just want to dump your responsibility to a your child as fast as you can. Are we supposed to stand up and cheer you on?)

[VeronicaGia]

Please help me. My girlfriend got pregnant intentionally
behind my back.

***You should always take precautions, no matter what.

She said she was on birth control, but was
lying.

***Is it possible that birth control failed?  It happens.

I do not want anything to do with this child. I want
to give up my parental rights and have nothing to do with
this child. How do I do this?

***Parental rights and parental obligations are two separate matters.  Your rights include the right to see the child, help physically raise the child, have access to medical and school records, etc.  Obligations means the obligation to pay support, help with medical insurance, day care, etc.  While in some cases it is possible to terminate your parental rights, it is next to impossible to terminate your parental obligations unless there is someone else willing to adopt the child.

And if I do, do I have to pay
child support?

***See above.

I live in PA and need help. This woman is
psycho! She already has two kids to two different dads,
looking to find someone to take care of her. Please reply, IM
or email me with any information you might have...Thank you
so much

***You need to start speaking to lawyers right now.  You need to get it together, hire an attorney and once the child is born, demand a court ordered DNA test.  Do not ever, ever ignore court papers or you will be found in default and it will be hell changing it.  

[StPaulieGirl]

He's 16 and needs to know these things.  I don't want to come down on you, but besides lying about BC, she could be lying about other things such as STD's.  Please get checked out.

Btw, if the paternity test comes up that you're a daddy, please rethink your position.  That child needs you.

[wendl]

well hate to say it but you choose to have sex with her that was consent cuz we all know what could happen

The only way you could relinquish your parental rights and obligations is by mom and you giving child up for adoption, if mom wants to keep the baby your stuck.

Even if the courts would allow you to give up parental rights, you will still have to pay child support.

So you have 2 choices

1) keep your parental rights, get paternity established, get visitation and be a dad
2) get no parental rights, pay for a child you wont see for the next 18 or more years.

personally I would want to see my child, its not the childs fault, I wasnt married to my ex and I really don't like him anymore BUT I deal with him cuz we have a wonderfull son together, he doesn't see his son (his choice) and my 12yr resents him for it, he also doesn't pay his child support and had gone to jail for not paying.

Many dads hear are fighting with all they have to just see their kids or be more active in their kids lives (my dh included) so you may not like what others have to say but we state it how it is.

Think real hard about the baby NOT the mother, if DNA shows this is your child could you really walk away????

[alamero]

>Please help me. My girlfriend got pregnant intentionally
>behind my back.

1. If you didn't use a condom (or didn't check the condom for defects before putting it on), then you were a VOLUNTARY sperm donor...with financial responsibility to the product of a successful conception, i.e., she didn't rape you and you didn't sign any surrogate parent agreement before sex. Right?

She said she was on birth control, but was
>lying.

2. See Response #1

I do not want anything to do with this child.

3. If you are a stand-up guy, whose lifestyle is superior to that of your child's mother, you would want to have at least 50/50 custody. If you're just some guy who spilled some semen and doesn't want to pay for it...for the next 18 yrs...See Response #1.

>I want to give up my parental rights and have nothing to do with this
>child.

4. If that's how you feel, the child is better off. No court can force a man to be a father...a check to the man's child, yes, but not a father.

>How do I do this? And if I do, do I have to pay child
>support?

5. If you really want to lose your parental rights, convince your ex to file for paternity, then sole legal and physical custody. Make sure that she has evidence that you will always be a physical threat to your child because of (physical abuse, substance abuse, sexual abuse, you pick). If you're willing to go to court and help the child's mother DEMONSTRATE that you are the scum of the earth and that you just don't give a f### about the child's safety and well-being while he/she is in your custody...I'm pretty sure you won't ever have to worry about terminating your parental RIGHTS.

>I live in PA and need help. This woman is psycho! She
>already has two kids to two different dads, looking to find
>someone to take care of her.

6. I almost feel sorry for you, because we are in the same boat for doing the same thing...being stupid. I knew that my next kid's other DNA contributor wasn't father material and I knew that if my period went missing, I would be on my own.

All it took was a few minutes (less than 3 to be exact) of thoughtlessness and here I am...on the other side of your drama. Like you, I knew the score before conception. Like you, I took the risk anyway.

Unlike you, I'm holding the bag (of waters) and that bastard wanted to keep having sex with me...after telling me that HE CAN'T be a father to this child because he already has too many kids. (Can you tell that he's not wanted around these parts anymore?)

Take care of your kid now, or the child might come looking for you later...when he or she is old enough to kick your ass for letting the psycho raise him/her by herself. I'm fighting to get my children away from a couple of sanity-challenged individuals, because I want to break the current cycle of dysfunction in my family's midst. However, you know your child's mother has problems...So, you want to leave your kid to hold the bag?

 Please reply, IM or email me with
>any information you might have...Thank you so much

7. See Response #6

[sweetnsad]

--Please help me. My girlfriend got pregnant intentionally
--behind my back.

That's impossible...the sex was obviously consentual, which means that when you play with fire....


--She said she was on birth control, but was
--lying.

Whether she was lying or not, if you don't want kids, take your OWN precautions...don't depend on the woman to do all the work...maybe the birth control failed...

--I do not want anything to do with this child.

You should have thought of this before you had sex with her...the risk is always there unless you both actually sit down and decide that children are not right for you at this time...then you both take the proper precautions...this child is innocent and deserves a father.

--I want to give up my parental rights and have nothing to do with
--this child.

Sure, give up your parental rights, but you still have to pay support no matter what....wouldn't you rather pay the support for your baby and still be allowed to have contact with him/her?  

--How do I do this? And if I do, do I have to pay
--child support?

See above.

--This woman is psycho! She already has two kids to two different dads

What was your first clue that maybe you should have taken more precautions when it came to birth control?  

I agree with Brent on this one....you are really in the wrong place asking for help in GIVING UP your child...most men are here with broken hearts because they are denied their children and need advice and guidance.  Step up for God sakes, and take responsibility for your actions....this child needs both a mother AND a father.

[txblonde]

Unfortunately, women have the right to plan your financial future for you and without your consent.  Yes, she is a psycho, but a very smart one, she knew what she was doing to get an additional paycheck for the next 19 or so years.  Since, I can relate to your situation, I truly feel sorry for anyone and every man that this happens to on a daily basis in America.

First, get a lawyer and get a paternity test.  You cannot afford to not do this.  And show up for court, if you do not, she wins by default regardless of a paternity test, YOU ARE THE FATHER.

If you are the father, I can only tell you in our case, we pay child support and have no relationship with the mother or the child.  Anything to do with the child will ALWAYS involve the pyscho.  Since pyscho showed her true colours from the beginning, we chose to live a life free from any involvement with her and for our family it was our saving grace.  We have paid 15 years and have never seen the mother or the child.  We have 4 years to go and will end the cs drama in silence.  It is a $100,000 debt that you simply have to pay off and go on with your life as best you can.  We thought it to be in the child's best interest to be 100% with the parent that wanted it (pyscho) and for the child to have one home, one family and not be divided between two families and since pyscho created a child out of her own selfish deceit that she should have 100% control over the situation she created.  DH is a wallet, but a content one considering how much worse financially and emotionally it would be had we had a relationship with greedy and immoral pyscho.  

Your only hope is for the woman to get married to another man and adopt your child, thus taking over the responsibility for child support.  In our case, psycho remarried when the child turned 1 year old, but refused her husband (of the last 13 years) to adopt the child because she did not want to turn down 18 years of child support monies.

In summary, you play, you pay.  It's an expensive lesson, life is not fair, but remember, it's not what happens to you in life, it's how you react.  Proceed with caution and make the best decision you can to serve your best interest, because the court and pycho don't care about you.  

Keep in mind, if you establish a relationship with the mother or the child, this will affect ALL future relationships.

These types of woman are rarely able to be rehabilitated.  She won't apologize, because she believe's it's all your fault.  It's a perpetual lie to you, to her friends and family and ultimately, the child.  You cannot reason with insanity.  

No flames, I wish you well, let us know how your situation turns out.

[Peanutsdad]

Ok folks, no point in even bumping this one with anymore replies, the poster has never bothered to reply again.