Without intending to...

[Mellybug]

Without intending to, I completely pissed off PBFH.

The children are with us for Easter, and today is my birthday (the day before Easter). We are having my boyfriend's "Daughter" (is not biologically his, but raised her for 7 years babysit his 2 younger children for two hours while we have dinner with his parents. Then, his parents are going to take the children to their house, and then to church in the morning, when we will pick them up and take them back home. All very wonderful gestures on the family's part for my special day.

We asked PBFH if she would please pack nice clothes for them for Church. She said she would. So far so good.

She called last night and wanted to talk to my boyfriend. He didn't want to talk to her, so gave the phone to each of the kids to talk. When his daughter said that Mommy wanted to talk to him, he asked her to please hang up. She did.

We took the kids to bed, and she called back and left a nasty message saying that she KNOWS we're there, and to pick up. We didn't. She says she wanted to know if she remembered to pack everything.

She called back and I answered, and per instructions from my boyfriend, explained to her calmly that he was unavailable, could I help her. She got REALLY pissy with me and demanded to talk to him. I told her that we had received her message, and that we had gotten all of the clothes we needed, thank you. (I did this VERY nicely - kill them with kindness). She snapped that she packed the wrong shirt, so we can just go BUY him one! and slammed down the phone on me.

She called back while I was on the phone with my father, and when I answered, she hung up on me.

This morning she called and started snapping at my boyfriend that WHERE was he? Why was he unavailable! And THEN said that if I didn't stop being a bitch to her then she wasn't going to pay off the business loan (his house is collateral, and she hasn't been paying on it for the past year anyway). He told her that it was none of her business where he was, and that she has already told him she wasn't going to pay the loan (we're suing her, but she doesn't know it yet), so she couldn't hold that over him anymore, it just wouldn't work. She started grilling him as to why his "daughter" was going to be watching the kids, and why their Grandparents were taking them tonight, and he told her that it was my birthday, and that's what they want to do. She started saying that SHE would have watched them, and he said, "No, thanks. You'll just use that against me later, too." Then, he just hung up.

Quite the way to start my birthday. My boyfriend hung up and then started laughing his butt off! He says, "Boy, even when you're nice you have a way of pissing her off!" He thinks it is absolutely hilarious! It actually made me laugh, too, seeing that it was so funny to him.

Sorry, just had to share.

Mellybug

[nosonew]

Melly, it pisses her off that you breathe.  I suggest continuing the "nice beyond nice" and continue to kill her with kindness.  Nothing will piss her off more than that, when you have done nothing to make her mad, yet she gets mad anyway.  My pbfh does that to me too, I am just as nice as pie, 99.9% of the time, but she glares me down, snaps nasty things to me in front of ss, and I just say, "I'm sorry you feel that way".  My ss is sick of the way she treats me and gives her tongue lashings as he calls it.  I'm sure the fact that he sticks up for me doesn't help her demeanor towards me any at all.  

Hang tough!!  AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

[richiejay]

Happy Birthday Melly!...you are definitely doing the right thing by being super nice...you can live with yourself, set a great example, and still continue to piss her off.....

[MYSONSDAD]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Your boyfriend and his kids really need someone like you in their lives. You have a positive attitude. Keep up the good work.

Even if you can not tape for court, TAPE. It might help convince someone of 'who has a problem' [attorney?]

Just a thought "you can catch more flies with honey"

Good strategy, keep it up!


"Children learn what they live"