I"M STUNNED!! Judge granted me a TRO...

[smtotwo]

against DH's ex!!

States that ex cannot
                      Make reports to social services unless SHE personally can verify the charges she's making!!

                      Cannot call dept. of probation and report to my probation officer, unless she has verifiable proof that I've done something.  She can no longer just call and make accusations like she did 2 weeks ago.

                    Children can call our home, but the ex cannot!!  Due to the threats and tone of the previos messages!!

                     She cannot be within 100 yards of me or my son. She has to make alternate arrangements for pick up of the kids, she is not allowed on my property.

I have never ever pulled the MY LAND MY HOUSE card on DH, but after I went to jail because of her lies She can not come onto my property or call MY home. I will call the police for trespassing if she does come here.


I was soo thrilled that FINALLY FINALLY we might get something done, also spoke to attorney about the civil suit because I lost 1 of my jobs.
He;s gonna brainstorm with some others in the office and let me know what I need to bring them to start the process!!

[MYSONSDAD]

"Children learn what they live"

[joni]

Good for you for pursuing this...you're absolutely right...you gotta lie down to be a doormat.   There so few places that we have sanctuary, our homes is one of those places.  You have to protect yourself and you son at all costs.

[onedaddy]

How did you get that all written in.  
We are currently in a custody trial that began last week.  At the end of all this I would like some of what you got.
BM has called DH's union as someone else attempting to get him kicked out, made 3 false claims with the police department causing him to be arrested 2x, BM's sister also made a false police report.  BM called CPS.  She picks up the phone line designated for the kids to speak to their father and then says he is harrassing her, she using this phone line for personal calls, etc.
We have proven almost all of these in different courts, divorce court, family court, criminal court, with CPS.  We have changed the pick-up and drop-off to the local police precincts. We asked requested in writing and through lawyers they have no verbal contact wiht us and we supplied them with our fax and email address.  They listen for a while but BM and SF eventually start callling our home again.
What sparked this and what did you bring to the judge?

[smtotwo]

I asked for a HARRASSMENT RESTRAINING ORDER-Restaining her from doing these things.

I compiled a short timeline of what she's done to me and my son specifically.   I think the final straw was that she made a report to social services concerning my son, that were all false, my son is 13 and has cerebral palsy.

I also have the taped messages that she left at our home.

While this is just a temporary order we have a hearing for a final hearing on 12-27-04.  MERRY CHRISTMAS PSYCHOMOMMY!!

I am on probation for bouncing checks during my separation with my ex, he cleaned out our accounts and I wrote checks to take care of the kids, school clothes and groceries. Our income tax return was supposed to cover the checks.  But he signed my name and cashed them.
Probation can put you on a probation hold if someone accuses you of a crime.  So DH's ex has accused me, at least twice, of threatening to kidnap the skids.  

DH and I are also filing a civil suit against her because I lost one of my jobs when I went to jail.  So we'll be asking for lost wages, for myself and DH (he had to take time off to care for my son and mother who is blind)

[smtotwo]

This is only temporary so I'll have to present all my evidence to the judge on the 27th.

But Like I said I have all her messages and letters she's written.

Hopefully this will turn into a 1 yr restraining order and keep her in line at least for a little while.

[onedaddy]

This seems like it's a long time coming.  Congratulations!

In my case, BM really only targets DH (so far).  To tell you the truth I wish she'd come after me.  I'd go after her with a serious vengenance.

We have one recording of her yelling and cursing that she's going to send me home in a body bag for coming with DH to pick up the kids.  
We have another recording of BM telling DH she would call the police and tell them he was harrassing her and he'd spend the weekend in jail if he picked up the kids for his visitation.  We have a few recording of her attempting to speak with DH while she has an order of refrain against him and her tome shows she has no fears of him.

We have a petition to NY Family Court that states she is in fear of her life and DH should have supervised visits and make both round trips to one court and then a week later she sends us a letter stating she has no problem with our visitation and one month after that a motion with NJ family court that she wants DH to ring her doorbell.

She filed her 1st harrassment charge against DH just 3 days after her 1st contempt.  2nd charge/1st atrrest 4 days after DH refused to give SF and BM permission to move out of state and 3 days after she appeared with SF on his patronizing a prostitue charge.  BM's sis filed charges the same week BM filed for supervised visitation.  CPS was called 11 days after her 2nd contempt and she filed her 3rd harrassment charge while we were on vacation, DH refused to speak with her when she picked up the phone and said she wasn't dropping them off for visitation the following week.

CPS closed the case due to "lack of credible evidence", the judge for the 2nd arrest found DH Not Guilty and said she wasn't credible and he did not believe a word she said.

BM took out a $5,000 loan using DH's ss# after the divorce and then let it go into default.  She consistently breaks the orders for phone visitation, 40 times in 7 months and during the course of the custody trial, denied visitation on 3 weekends and moved the kids 6 times lastly just 2 months ago without any notice to DH even the orders state she must.  We have proof that SF agressively threatens DH, 2x in court. He is a violent convict with 26 arrests for asualt, arson, domestic violence....

We began our custody trial last week and BM was caught in too many lies to count and SF cursed DH in front of the officers. There seems to be no punishment for purgery. Our next trial date is set for tomorrow and then probaby 2 more dates in January.

We filed a small claims case against her since she has no money, no equity but that will not take place until June 15th.  The case is for false arrest/imprisonment/lawyer fees/lost wages against DH.  The maximum amount is $5,000.  This seems like an awfully small amount for all she has done. I wish I could get in on the act.
 

[smtotwo]

Its about them facing consequences for their actions.

[onedaddy]

I agree!  It would be nice to have a judgement hanging over her head so she can remember what she did and the consequences to her actions will follow her.  Only problem with that is a good lawyer in civil court would cost us $3500 and after spending over $40,000 on this custody trial and a new baby on the way in a matter of weeks it is $$ we just can't afford to spend right now.

[flewwellin]

Congrats on the TRO!!   Some people go out of their way to make it difficult for others, and i've noticed that divorce and custody expose some of the nastiest ppl out there!