PRO SE LITIGANT IN NEED OF HELP AGAIN

[Doodlebug]

Dear Soc:

Thank you for the help you have given me so far. I would like to briefly give you some fact of my situation so it might help you to help me.  

1997 voluntarily admitted myself to 90 drug treatment program.  9 surgeries and took too many pain meds.  Rather than let my parents take the kids, ex agreed to take them until i got myself together.  during the 90 days ex filed for divorce.  had pro bono lawyer, but was talked into dropping by ex.

Got things together and started seeing kids on every other weekend overnight visits, school vacations holidays and when he and gf needed time for their vacations or a babysitter.  Gf kept me aprised of behavior, health, academic and overall well being of the children.  We had wonderful communication.

new gf showed up.  during one of my visits with children at the advice of a therapist, i explained to my kids why they live with their dad and not me.  Addiction to pain meds.  Also had pamphlets etc on talking to you kids about drugs.  

this got misconstrued that i was using drugs in front of children and visits were stopped.  I moved and visits were started again.  Back to the every other weekend schedule.  then one day out of the blue, when i dropped my kids of as scheduled a message was relayed to me through ex sister in law from ex that this was to be my last visit.  No reason being given.

since that time, i have attempted to exercise my right to visitation with the forms provided here in this site, have tried to attempt mediation and have tried to beg and plead with ex for visits with my kids or a reason why.  All attempts have gone unanswered or iginored.  

Ex requested a drug test.  I agreed and sent him copies of four tests through out the past year.  Ex requested supervised visits with mother.  I agreed and asked him to set this up.  never was and went back to asking for drug tests again.  Basically everything i agree to, he wants something else.  

Car accident in Dec. 2002 almost took my life and slowed progress on pursuing this case.  finally was able to file for contepmt Nove 2003.  Case went to court and cross motion was filed for supervised visits which was granted to ex.  

Ex stated abandonment of the children when in fact i did not in any way shape or form abandon them.  the only reason why i have not seen them is because he has refused to let me see them and has since stopped them from seeing my mother also because i have moved in with her.  

I cannot get the judge to listen to me.  everything i ask or try to say just gets skated over in court.  I am seeking a low fee attorney and my mother is going to lend me the money but in the meantime i have a court date on March 3.  

Questions:

1.  When would i ask the court for a finding of facts and conclusions of law on its rationale for reducing my contempt motion to one of enforcement and ask to further explain why such oppressive visitation requirements?  do i just bring it up?

2.  Supervised visitation costs are ordered to be shared by both parties, but modification is asking for the fee to be based on my income and i pay all.  Can I request that it still be shared even though they are modifying it?

3.  what is the best thing for me to say or do until i am able to obtain an attorney as my court date is march 3 and I will not be able to get one before then?  Is there anything I can do to let the court know that i need time to brief an attorney?

4.  the judge has all copies of requests to exercise visits, drug tests notarized letter from previous gf stating that visits were consistent and all other data to prove there is no abandonment, but refusal so can i ask that contempt motion be reconsidered?

Thank you for you time and i hope the added info helps you to help me better.  I am not ashamed of the facts as i have done nothing to warrant the stopping of my visits.  I just want to see my kids like i did before.  

thank you,
Sincerely,
Lisa D.



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[socrateaser]

>1.  When would i ask the court for a finding of facts and
>conclusions of law on its rationale for reducing my contempt
>motion to one of enforcement and ask to further explain why
>such oppressive visitation requirements?  do i just bring it
>up?

If I were handling it I would have filed a written motion requesting this.

>2.  Supervised visitation costs are ordered to be shared by
>both parties, but modification is asking for the fee to be
>based on my income and i pay all.  Can I request that it still
>be shared even though they are modifying it?

You can ask for anything. Don't know if you will get it.


>3.  what is the best thing for me to say or do until i am able
>to obtain an attorney as my court date is march 3 and I will
>not be able to get one before then?  Is there anything I can
>do to let the court know that i need time to brief an
>attorney?

Based on your facts, the judge is pretty much against you already, so the bottom like is that if you really want a meaningful opportunity to get back with these kids again then you will pawn everything of value that you have and GET an attorney. If you don't, you're sunk.

>4.  the judge has all copies of requests to exercise visits,
>drug tests notarized letter from previous gf stating that
>visits were consistent and all other data to prove there is no
>abandonment, but refusal so can i ask that contempt motion be
>reconsidered?

Sure, but the judge isn't gonna do anything that you want because he believes that he can roll over you and dispose of the case. You need a lawyer.